We can have amazing days despite our illness, but we still pay the price. Rhonda explains.
“By day the Lord directs His love, at night his song is with me—a prayer to the God of my life.” (Psalm 42:8)
Payday. That phrase has two meaning.
One is good—payday, as in the day you receive payment for services rendered. You get money!
The other meaning, means that it’s time to pay-up. The day you have to pay has arrived. It is time to pay the price.
Today is “payday” for me. . . and no I’m not receiving money. Rather I’m “paying-up”–paying the price–for the activity I did the yesterday. I had to opportunity to attend a local, annual festival, a car show, and meet with some staff of a company which makes a great product. When I chose to do anything, I have to consider, “Is this activity worth the extra pain?”
Often, I’m asked, “If it increases the pain, why do it?” Well, I live with chronic pain—it is a constant. And over the years, I’ve learned that if I do nothing I still hurt. So, when I have the opportunity to do something fun and enjoyable, I do my best to enjoy it. And yes, all the while, I know that I’ll have to pay the price for it. So, I’m now “paying” for the activity. My headache and pain is severe.
So, was the activity really worth the increase in pain? Let’s see . . .
Pros of doing something fun:
1. Learned about new products to help me as I continue to work toward being healthier.
2. Met some nice people at both the festival and car show.
3. Met the staff from Sunshine Burger and enjoyed talking with them.
4. Spent time outside in the beautiful sunshine.
Cons of yesterday’s activities:
1. Increased pain.
Four to one. I’d say that the activity was worth the increased pain.
So, now that payday as arrived, what do I do? Again that comes down to choices. I can focus on the pain and how much I hurt, or I can enjoy the fun memories and continue to enjoy today.
How long will payday last? It varies. It can take a day for my pain level to return to “normal” or it can take a few weeks. One aspect of learning to live with chronic pain is realizing that the pain will get even worse from time to time. And making wise decisions in choosing what to do when.
Since today is a payday for me, I knew that I’d have to change my focus from my pain to something better. So, I have been listening to some great music this morning (Bryan Duncan, Damaris Carbaugh, The Ball Brothers, to name a few). And I listened to some Sermons on Ecclesiastes (Calvary Baptist Church).
“By day the Lord directs His love, at night his song is with me—a prayer to the God of my life.” (Psalm 42:8)
On payday the key for me is to keep my focus off the pain, and focus on the positive and uplifting! On some days, to pay the price is very difficult, but I’ve learned that when I change my focus—payday (having to owe), turns into a payday—receiving blessings from God!
Even on payday I can create a positive day. . . if I make the right choice in changing my focus!
Prayer: Lord, thank you for the day of fun! And when the paydays arrive, please help me to focus on You and the many blessings You send my way. Thank you for directing Your love to me! Amen.
About the Author:
Rhonda Sawtelle lives with chronic headaches and pain due to failed back surgery syndrome. Her philosophy is “Create a positive day!” She enjoys watching football, NASCAR, and golf, and creating digital scrapbooking, and reading. To read more about how Rhonda creates a positive day, even while living with pain, visit her blog: http://createapositiveday.blogspot.com.
When a payday arrives and you find you must pay the price for having done something fun, what do you do to keep your focus on the positive?
It can be hard to remember that we are only asked by God to take one day at a time. Listen to Jeremy Camp sing, “One Day at a Time.”
When I read “Even on payday I can create a positive day. . . if I make the right choice in changing my focus!,” I was reminded of something my pastor said last night at church. He said we must “Focus on the Master, not the disaster!” And that’s so true.
I have several invisible illnesses, some physical, some psychological, the worst of which is PTSD. I thought I was okay at church last night. I got through the service and the last thing I remember is walking to my Mom’s car to go ahead and get in because I was tired. My sister was right behind me. When I “woke up” I was on the other end of the parking lot. I black out often and unexpectedly and have no recollection of what goes on until I really wake back up, even though I may appear to wake up several times. I’ve started running, trying to get away from the person who molested me as a child, (causing the PTSD.) Apparently I blacked out, woke up, fought to get away from my sister and mom and a few grown men who were trying to help me get into the car, and then I ran right through the parking lot of people going home from church, got close to the other side of the parking lot and blacked out again. It seems parts of my illness are not always invisible. I can’t even think about the kids on the playground and how they must have felt – I’m sure they think I’m crazy for sure! Luckily, the adults mostly know what’s going on and help me. I thank GOD for them daily! But today is “PayDay” for me too. I have scrapes on my head, elbow, knee, and leg, somehow my flip-flops came off and my feet were already cracked from some nutritional deficiencies, but now they are blistered and very scraped up, and the only way I can describe the pain is that my whole body feels like it has a severe migraine. But was sitting in that service last night and knowing my children, my niece, and my nephews were in their classes learning more about GOD worth how I feel today? Absolutely, I’d go through all that nonsense a million times over (and likely will – LOL) just for that and it will always be totally worth it!
Thank you so much for your articles, I especially enjoyed reading this one – I really believe GOD led me to actually check my emails today just so I would read this one. Thank you for serving HIM in this way!
Tara
Thank you so much for this new “view” of Payday. I suffer from many chronic illnesses which cause much pain and fatigue. But today I am choosing to pick up my grandson from kindergarden and bringing him home to spend time with him. I will be in extreme heat and having to walk what for me will be a great distance. Then once home fixing snacks and spending what I hope to be quality time with him. Tomorrow and possibly the day after will be my “Paydays”.
But this time I will choose to focus on the positives of my time with him (which always seems to be worth it), and looking towards the Lord and all of the blessings I have received from Him.
This wonderful article came just in time as I will not worry about tomorrow, just enjoy my time with my grandchild today.
Linda
Rhonda – your devotional is spot on.
I, too ( and I am certain that ALL of our readers will relate ) often make a decision based on wanting to keep what I can “normal” in my life even when I know that the aftermath ( the payday ) will arrive.
Like you, I try to face such after-days/weeks with the memories of what I was able to enjoy. In fact, I often enjoy my times “out” more when I am not in the midst of them pushing through my challenges to enjoy them while engaged.
Relaxing at home afterwards, though with heightened challenges – is what makes the times away seem more golden – kind of a mini -vacation without going anywhere!
Thanks for the great devotional!
Love,
Lynn