Do you ever have trouble figuring out how not to overdo? Lisa shares a few of the ways she is learning to avoid becoming overwhelmed.
“For I can testify that they gave as much as they were able and beyond their ability.” (2 Corinthians 8:3)
How many times have you done as much as you were able . . . and then a little more? It seems that this is my existence. I remember last year after I started a new medication my rheumatologist of a few months said, “Feel free to push a little more than usual.” I told my husband, “He obviously doesn’t know me that well yet, because I never stop pushing!”
For me to do as much as I am able– and then beyond my ability– is part of life. But it is not through my own strength. It is only with the Lord’s guidance and setting the right priorities I am learning how not to overdo.
Here are some of the ways I have tried to teach myself how not to overdo:
Ignore routines and systems that other people say are the best way to do things.
I don’t do housework on a daily schedule that most people recommend, and I don’t always read my Bible in the morning. Frankly, when I get out of bed I am still foggy and my body is not working. I can read a scripture or two but to really dig into the Word, I need to wait until I am a bit more awake.
Avoid planning too many priorities per day.
I don’t make doctor appointments earlier than 9 AM (10:20 is perfect if it the doctor’s schedule allows.) If I have any appointment on a given day, that is my energy for the day. I don’t plan something else.
Find the simplest way to do things.
I use my crock pot, I am a fan of adaptive tools to make things easier, I love mason jars for tons of items because not only are they cute, they seal well, but I can still get the jar rings off.
Remember to have fun.
I will watch my favorite TV show, Parenthood, in bed. I will browse a thrift store, or find something I can spray paint. My daily indulgence is reading fiction books.
When I am trying to keep up with all the chaos of life and the schedules of our family, it can be hard to remember my own advice on how not to overdo. Little by little, however, I am saying, “No, I won’t be able to make that” more often; I don’t volunteer for every snack that is needed for a children’s event to prove I am not a lazy mom.
I remember that when I do as much as I am able–that is it! I am done for the day. . . and if anyone needs anything else from me, it will have to be through God’s strength. And frequently He will provide it. When my son needs extra help with homework or my husband has had a rough day and work and need to vent, I pray that God will always fulfill the needs I have to keep pushing in order to be a comfort to those around me.
Prayer: Lord, when I stand before You I hope that You are able to say that I did as much as I was able. And yet, I accomplished the simplest thing You truly desire–a relationship with You and my compassion for others. Teach me how not to overdo, one day at a time. Amen.
About the author:
Lisa Copen is the founder of Rest Ministries and she lives in San Diego with her husband and son. She is (once again!) working on her books for moms with chronic illness and making some real progress and learning as she writes how to better serve her family–which means knowing how not to overdo! If you are a mom with a chronic illness, “like” her Facebook Page for Moms with Illness to be a part of contributing with your stories and suggestions.
Do you need to learn how not to overdo? What does overdoing look like for you? Does it tend to occur when you are trying to take care of others?
Do you ever grow tired of just trying to keep up with everything in life? Why do we have so much trouble trying to learn how not to overdo? This is one of my favorite songs from a friend and artist, Gwen Smith, “Restore.” We hope you enjoy! -Lisa
Oh you explained this so well Lisa! LOVE your really practical suggestions & tips.
Why is it that people can see us as lazy? Everyone I’ve “met” on RM used to way overdo things before becoming ill…..& still do! So it’s not in our nature to be lazy!!! Just taking a shower & washing my hair is overdoing things these days! Other days getting dressed is even too much! I sure have learnt to listen to my body, rather than what others say or think! Without major rest my body won’t improve, so it’s kinda become my no. 1 priority to care for myself with guidance from God, my Dr & Nutritionist/Naturopath.
I do what you do, read my devotionals & scripture later in the day when the “fog” has cleared. Sitting quietly with God is earlier in the day, when I babble less!! LOL! I’m so VERY thankful that I don’t need to explain myself, or defend myself, with the Lord. He knows & comforts me in this. Thanks again Lisa. Lotsoluv Kerryn
Yes! this is a deff a prob I have at times. Just today my Cardiologist said, you might need to slow down a bit till can get your health under control.Which is funny because, getting my health issues “under control” has not happened in the last 5 yrs. But I do know that when God asks me to do something that is extra in my Life, he always gives me the energy and strength, though him, to get it accomplished. Thank you God for your strength & pls help me to say no when needed. Amen Diane Kalata
Lisa, thank you so much for sharing on this subject. It has been an extremely hard adjustment for me to go from a busy schedule of full-time work and social activities to living in complete isolation, except for medical and food errands. I literally felt as if the brakes had been slammed suddenly on my life, and everything came to a complete stop.
Anyway, I can totally identify with what you said about the housework. I generally break it down to one chore a day. As for my Bible study time, thankfully, I am able to work that in first thing in the morning, with my coffee.
I did want to comment on what you said about priorities. Here’s what I do: I understand first of all that God is my top priority, and everything else aligns under him. My next priority is my health, because if I am not healthy, I cannot do anything for anyone! Keep in mind these are my priorities. However, that does not mean that I always schedule my time accordingly. (The other morning at 1 AM, when my pain reached an intolerable level, I didn’t spend an hour doing Bible study before I went to the ER! I just went.)
Also, I always schedule my doctor’s appointments in the afternoon, as late as possible. I have Chronic Daily Migraines, and they usually hit the hardest in the mornings, so afternoons are better times for me to leave the house.
One other practical note: I have found it helpful to keep a day of rest/stay at home between days out. If I go to the doctor on Monday, I plan on staying home on Tuesday. This seems to work well for me, in terms of pacing myself. When I make an appointment, I write it on my calendar, then mark through the day before and the day after, so I’ll know not to schedule anything on those days.
Sorry this is a little long. Can you tell I live alone? LOL.
Thanks again for your sharing, and keep up the good work.
Sherry
Lisa, this is so practical and relevant! Being able to pace and prioritize is a must when dealing with chronic illness. I believe it does start with realizing – as you said – that it’s okay to ignore routines and systems that OTHER people say work…maybe they do work for some…but I’ve learned it’s okay if we need to seek other ways of doing things that work for our own situations.God is so gracious to grant creativity in seeking out such things. (Example: I recently realized I could “swiffer” the floor sitting on a kitchen chair.LOL) And the neat fhing is, that just as you are doing here, along with Kerryn, Diane and Sherry…we are able to share with others the things God shows us to be helpful in our situations and it can either give ideas to others or it can encourage them to branch out in seeking out their own possibilities. We just have to keep trying until we find what is a good fit for our situations. Thanks for the encouragement! Blessings and gentle hugs…BeBe <3
Great practical tips. Always looking for better ways to manage my health issues so they don’t affect me more and put me down and out! Thanks!
How good to read this devotional Lisa, as well as all the comments. For me, it’s been a long process of learning not to overdo. I would think that applies to most of us. Every day is a new challenge to make wise decisions re the “To do” list. But, as some of you said, we can think through priorities and other things ahead to use a guidelines.
I have a little card in the bathroom with a really encouraging prayer on it. It’s called “Each Day to Do Your Will”.
“Help me to remember, Lord that there is time enough to do Your will each day. Not everything I think I should do or that others desire for me but Your will in Your time.”
Thanks for the great tips.
Wonderful prayer Beth! Thanks…..I soaked that in today. Lotsoluv Kerryn