“Do not let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouths, but only what is helpful for building others up according to their needs, that it may benefit those who listen.” (Ephesians 4:29)
In Paul’s letter to the Ephesians he gives us the above advice–words we’ve no doubt heard many times before.
When I read these instructions again recently, I was in a pretty bad place. Emotionally I was really struggling and I knew that because I was finding it hard to just make it through each day, I was less tolerant of other people around me and quicker to be critical, or thoughtless in my responses to them.
I guess you could say that this verse really hit home.
I know that I can be hard to be around when I go through those times where the chronic part of chronic pain, really gets me down. When I find myself overwhelmed by my circumstances and wondering how I’m going to keep on doing this, when it’s so hard.
Those around me, may not be able to understand what I’m going through, or may not even be aware that I’m struggling–so the rude, critical, or offhand responses I make, may seem hurtful.
This passage goes on to say the following things:
“Be kind and compassionate. . . Be imitators of God. . . live a live of love.” (Ephesians 4:32 5:1-2)
That’s hardly how I’ve felt towards others–I’m ashamed to say. I know I fall short of that behaviour so many times.
I’ve often said that it appears God has chosen not to heal me now, but He has given me the grace to go on living with my pain. Only by God’s grace can I go on facing each day and only with His help can every word, thought and act–be love.
Prayer: Father, may the words I speak, be helpful, not hurtful to others and may my behaviour be something to point others towards You, not turn them away. I acknowledge that I can’t do this alone, I daily need your help. Amen.
About the Author:
Fiona Burrows lives in Melbourne, Australia. She is thankful for the difference God makes in her life, and the lessons He is teaching her, as she lives with chronic back pain. She enjoys finding time for reading, writing, and photography, and to travel when she is able. You can contact her in the Sunroom.
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Have there been times when you have said or done things that have turned others away from God? How do you stop that from happening?
Today’s devotional was just what I needed to hear today: God has given me the grace gift to live with pain, diabetes, sleep apnea, peripheral neuropathy and more. When I accept this grace gift, I can stop asking why. Thank you for this blessed message for the day.
Fiona, showing love when we feel this bad is not only hard, it’s impossible. That’s exactly why we need the Holy Spirit to teach and train us and shine the love of our Saviour through us.
Unfortunately, it’s our families, the ones we love the most, who are most apt to get the negative, unkind words spoken to them. I am trying, with God’s help to give me patience and love as I interact with my hubby especially. But also to others with whom I interact.
Thanks for this Fiona.
Your cyber bud, Beth
Thanks Kay & Beth for your comments. Isn’t it lucky that there is enough grace to go around for each one of us!
You are so right Beth, that we often tend to treat those closest to us in the harshest way. As you said, we need to keep trying to do things better, with God’s help.
Blessings,
Fiona
Fiona, your devotional brought tears to my eyes today. I am so tired, and tired of pain and being tired. It IS hard to go on each day with patience and a kind word. I have snapped at my husband, been impatient with my daughter, and finally put myself in a time out. It is pretty bad when you don’t even want to keep company with yourself.
Oh but He gives grace, and He gives power to the weak. The verse I have claimed for my mission statement with my writing is Psalm 19:14. We don’t have to try to work up niceness in our own strength, isn’t that great? His grace and love can shine thru us, once we give our hearts and spirits to Him. I have been doing that many times lately. Many, many times.
Kay, I have many of the pain and health problems you do. Beth, you and Fiona are friends that I am so thankful to know,
Sandra
Hi Sandy,
I was thinking about you the other day as I know things have been tough lately for you. I’m sorry that you can identify – it’s no fun feeling that way is it? I want to remember what you said about not having “to work up niceness in our own strength” – that is a great statement and something that gives us such hope.
Thanks for your comments and I pray God will give you the courage to rise above the pain and tiredness, so you coninue to shine for Him.
Blessings,
Fiona