Illness can easily make us feel far from beautiful. S.L. shares how vital a godly perspective is.
“Your beauty should not come from outward adornment, such as elaborate hairstyles and the wearing of gold jewelry or fine clothes. Rather, it should be that of your inner self, the unfading beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is of great worth in God’s sight” (1 Peter 3:3-4).
I had a moment of panic earlier this week when I realized that my hair started seriously falling out. Thanks to immune system issues this has happened before, but this time it I felt God nudging me.
Our culture is obsessed with beauty and much of our valuation is based on externals. It is something I’ve never felt I could really measure up to since chronic illness’s consequences wreak havoc on our looks and ability to do things. Hence, when one of my last physical attributes that I was proud of started to go, I used to feel incredibly down.
But that is our culture and not what God says about us. What makes us beautiful and valuable isn’t even the things we do. It’s a gentle and quiet spirit.
One of my biggest heroes is Corrie Ten Boom. I first read her story when I was little; I was encouraged by her faith as she was sent to a concentration camp for hiding Jews in World War II. She was an absolutely beautiful person–not because of how she looked or what she did–but because of her spirit. Her love for and trust in God shone through even in the darkest of circumstances.
Obviously, losing my hair is not the darkest of circumstances. Chronic illness isn’t fun, but the pain gives us a head start to refine our spirits if we choose to focus on God through it. Like Corrie, that is what will make us truly beautiful.
This is what made my hair issues different this time. We should desire to be beautiful in His eyes rather than in the worlds since that is where our value really is. No matter what our physical issues, we should be encouraged because we can be beautiful to God.
Prayer: Dear Heavenly Father, thank You so much for being there for us in every circumstance and that You are big enough to handle them all. Thank You for Your sustaining grace no matter what is going on with us. Please help us focus on You and help refine our spirits so we can be beautiful in Your eyes. Please help us let go of the world’s ideas of beauty and stop measuring ourselves against a standard that doesn’t matter. Amen.
About the author:
S.L. Payne lives in North Carolina with her husband, three biological sons and foster daughter. She has had fibromyalgia since she was a little girl, but it thankful for God’s faithfulness. She loves writing, photography and laughing with her family. Her blog is The Proverbs 31 Project at adventuresofaneverydaygirl.blogspot.com where she hopes she can encourage others.
Are you using God’s standard or the world’s as a lens to view yourself? How can you refocus yourself if you are judging yourself based on a worldly standard?
This is a song with so many lyrics I think you will relate to. Christa Wells sings “More Than I Am” and it refers to God making us complete–not our appearance. You can see the lyrics here if you are interested http://christawellsmusic.com/portfolio-view/feed-your-soul-lyrics/. She shares in this song how we don’t feel inspired or amazing, and yet God sees us before we are born. He loves us just as much now as He did then. I hope this song brings you some comfort. -Lisa
this devotional is an encouragement, as I often feel i never look like much, but knowing God accepts us as we are a verse which helped me was we are fearfully and wonderfully made Psalm 139 v14 (I think)
Thank you Lorna! I absolutely love that verse 🙂 It is a huge encouragement to me that God isn’t worried about what the world cares about; we are valuable and beautiful to Him. So much more important than chasing the world’s acceptance. Hope you are having a blessed day!
Agape,
S.L. Payne
S.L. – oh, you are so right. Our culture! Everywhere we look, we gaze on the obsession of looking a certain way that the world defines as beauty. And that is just in our day. We can look at other time periods in our own country’s history ( or world history ) and the “norm” for beauty was different.
I know I fall into the trap and always come up short. It can rob me of time spent thinking on something worthwhile.
It was interesting ( to me ) as I read your devotional to think upon what Jesus looked like in his physical appearance. Each of us might have formed a mental picture of Him that we can go to when we think of Him. But look at how He has been depicted in images over these thousands of years. There is the “Hollywood version” and artist’s versions.
It made me search out in Scripture how he was described in Isaiah 53:2A which I’d say can be trusted to be accurate. “He had no beauty or majesty to attract us to him, nothing in his appearance that we should desire him.”
I don’t seek Him out for how He looked/looks but for the love and relationship I want to continue building with Him. And although I have my body that was formed by Him and He loves it no matter what my illnesses and aging have done. I know that, just as you have shared, He wants me to care for my body but not be obsessed with what the culture says is “beautiful. I pray anyone wanting to know me is drawn by some of the qualities that drew those in Jesus’ time to him – what shone out of him. As we have his Spirit within us, that is what I hope to foster and share.
Wow – look at what you gave me to think about. THANKS!
Love, Lynn 🙂
Sl, what an encouragement to each of us. I think all of us deal with some sort of physical appearance issue at one time or another, and the truth of it is as you said, true beauty come from within from God’s ever present spirit and live within us. Ths so much for that reminder today.
I also liked Lynn’s comment on what Jesus may have looked like. What better way to focus than on the one who’s image we are all made in. Thank you too lynn. Blessings, Di
Thanks S.L. 🙂
I confess to chuckling at the verse at the start of your devotional. With no energy with CFS to have “elaborate hairstyles” or shop at all for “fine clothes” both of those things are out! Then add multiple chemical sensitivities that cuts out going to the hairdressers, doing make-up, nails or having lotions or potions for my body. Finally add my belly that makes PJ pants the most comfy things to wear….. well….. just as well that I’m ” beautiful to God!” 😉 Gotta keep smiling!
I do hope your that your hair WILL return stronger & healthier soon. God bless. Lotsoluv Kerryn
Thank you SL for a Godly reminder. It can be terribly frustrating that even with my best efforts it’s sometimes difficult to be satisfied with the results. How comforting is it to know that He sees past the exterior. I do hope that your hair loss is temporary and recovers well.
Me too, Kerryn. Gotta love those pants. Such a relief He thinks I’m beautiful 🙂
Lynn, thank you for that reference to Jesus’ looks. It does give me perspective.
I too love those pants. My skin hurts often and my usual “uniform,” is fleece PJ pants and a long sleeve tee shirt. I am a Pastor’s wife, and one time we moved to a new church in late fall. The door had been open all day as boxes and furniture had been moved in all day. After we closed the door, and I made sandwiches for my (then) little ones, I made a cup of tea and put on my daughters fleece Eeyore pants and an old tee shirt, fleece socks that were black, pink, and red striped. All I could find that was soft and warm! Some of the older women in the church dropped in with some warm potluck food! We did have a nice visit
I did not realize until they left what a fashion plate I must have looked like! 🙂
Lynn, I love what you said about the norms for beauty being different through the ages! C.S. Lewis said something about that, I believe, in the Screwtape Letters- he wrote about how the ideals of feminine beauty cycle, all of which are practically unobtainable for the purpose of making both men and women discontent with real women (since the book is written from the perspective of a mentor demon teaching a younger one how to tempt and keep people away from God). Loved that passage since it basically communicates how all of this idealizing keeps us from seeing others and ourselves how God sees us and missing out on the beauty that He gave us since we keep longing for that which isn’t really attainable.
Diane, thank you so much! I agree that we all struggle with appearance issues- keep reminding myself that God looks at the heart! I think it is probably an ongoing battle for most of us!
Kerryn, Linda, and Sandra: Yes! I love the pajama pants! I have a couple pairs of sweats that I absolutely love and live in all the time. I was so sad when one pair came out of the wash with silly putty permanently adhered to one of the legs! Occupational hazard of three boys! And yes, I still wear them anyways! Leggings are my one of my favorite, socially acceptable thing to wear out with a long shirt or something because I get to feel like I am still in pajamas! Totally agree!
Agape,
S.L.
Sandy, you did have me giggling!! 😉 My guess is that those women went away thinking “Thank goodness this is a sensible pastor’s wife, who is real & whom we’ll be able to relate to easily!”
S.L, I chuckled at the silly putty!! My washing machine was always full of sand with 3 boys! Oh the joys of boys, but I wouldn’t have it any other way!
Wouldn’t it be fun if we could all join together in a pyjama party…. of course most of us would be nodding off to sleep in between chats! 😉 Keep smiling ladies!! God bless. LOTSoluv Kerryn
S.L., what a thrill your title alone gives me!!!!
Many years ago, I heard that “life is one long lesson in humility” and I believe it more now than ever. But what a beautiful quality humility is. I think it’s highly underrated. It’s akin to a “gentle spirit” don’t you think?
It’s not easy to ignore the world’s view of beauty. I have a long way to go, but God has used my chronic illness to “force me” to not be so anxious about my appearance. It’s either that or go over the edge.
Thank you so much S.L. for dealing with this subject!
Lynn, I really appreciated your comments!
Yes, illness often requires special clothing! I was always a size 12-14, and now I’m buying 18’s for the
bottom but Medium for the tops. I have just discovered catalogs for the “woman within” – NEVER
imagined that would happen to me! I do have fun and look through the catalogs for hours. Last summer
I had to buy a whole new wardrobe, so with watching all the specials, it wasn’t as “spendy,” but now I
have the fun of new outfits without any store shopping!! Not only have I produced a “belly”, but my legs
are very sensitive to touch and I have to get something that won’t hurt. (idiopathic peripheral neuropathy
for the past 8 or 9 years.) Yesterday I was at a F&F store and got some microfabric pants – what a nice
silky feel! Thanks for all your comments on beauty as a Christian!! God sees us all as beautiful people
in Christ!