This life can be hard for many of us to imagine if we are healthy, but consider those moms and dads who are chronically ill; those who face the daily pain and physical limitations at we face living with illness, yet they also have a spouse who may not even be home for months at a time.

Wednesday Jocelyn Green, author of Faith Deployed will share a story with us from her book about a chronically ill mom and wife who is in a military family. The article, “Worn Out and Weary” is by Ronda Sturgill, quite an amazing woman that we featured on the cover of one of our HopeKeepers Magazines [no longer in print] back in 2005.

A couple of weeks ago we asked our readers if there were any military families out there who would be willing to share a look into her life, and Erin eagerly responded. So, I am proud to introduce you to Erin Wang and her family.

Can you tell us about your family and the illness you live with.

My husband and I have been married for almost seven years. I married him late in his US Navy Officer career, and have not had to live with long deployments, but he does travel frequently. We have one five-year-old son. While I have always had chronic migraines and headaches, I was diagnosed with severe fibromyalgia when my son was born while we were stationed in Japan. I still feel like I’m not to the bottom of my diagnosis, as I have new symptoms developing.

How do you prepare for your husband’s deployment in regard to your illness and it’s challenges?

I have experienced being stationed in five places in six years of marriage–and this really has been one of the hardest parts for me as I live with chronic pain and illnesses. Preparing for my husband’s (often overseas) trips has been quite hard because of these moves, and I have had a little-to-no support system. With the stress of a fresh move under my belt, it seems that the first trip my husband takes after each move, my body gives out in some unexpected way, and I’m literally left with no known person to call for help. Calling on strangers in my greatest time of need has not gotten any easier.

Since you likely do not live near family, who is part of your support team?

I hire babysitters off the internet, and have to trust that God will send me the right person. (He has every time!)– though I stress out over doing the process again and again each move, and make sure to stay home in a separate room for the first few times they babysit! This is always one of the first things I do after a move, as I know that that help is the only thing that keeps me going as a mom with chronic illnesses.

I am generally outgoing and push myself to seek relationships quickly with every move– with new neighbors (on and off bases, depending on where we have lived), church members at new churches, and strangers I start conversations with in the stores and schools and at playgrounds of new cities.

But it is often just too physically hard to be able to do the things that build and maintain relationships, when simply getting a shower two times a week is a miracle! And I feel I must hoard what little energy I have to be able to care for my son, let alone make my doctors appointments.

Most Officer’s wives I’ve met are kind, but I have yet to meet one who struggles with daily, chronic illnesses and caring for young children– that would really be a blessing all around

Regardless of who I meet, opening up to new people who don’t know anything about me and my past has been difficult. I have been judged and rejected more often than accepted. With each move, I have joined or started chronic illness support groups, sought out professional counselors, joined women’s Bible studies and couples bible studies, joined a Japanese play-group or two (I speak Japanese and had been a missionary to Japan).

The only success I felt I really had was the emotional support of the chronic pain groups, whether Christian or not. I have a personality that is intensely open and honest about my reality, including that I am a childhood abuse survivor, and I guess I have learned that these moves and building deep-but-brief relationships with “healthy” women is just not what is going to happen for me. But God may surprise yet!

Really, my best support team member is my God! Early in my diagnosis, I really struggled to even go to church or read my Bible for the first time in nearly thirty years of being a Christian. Praying was really just me crying–mad at God! I had been married just two years to my husband– two years to the Navy Life.

I had a six-month-old colicky baby (diagnosed later with Sensory Processing Disorder/ SPD), and had just gone through an international move, among other things! Where was God? It really has taken time to re-build what my relationship with God is. And I am still trying to figure that out. But I know He is faithful. I know God is love.

What are some of the challenges you face as a chronically ill spouse living in military life?

Changing doctors so frequently has been hard as well, as there is no history or continuity of treatment. I have really been learning to be my own advocate and to know my illnesses and medications.

And there is the added benefit of getting loads of “second opinions”! It was my fourth Neurologist on my fourth move that diagnosed me with Essential Tremor (that others had discounted) and persevered to find a medication that helped my migraines for the first time in twenty years of having them. Praise the Lord!!

When you have to move, how do you do this without overdoing physically? Do you have a system you’d like to share?

People joke that I must be an expert mover! That really is not the case– and there are career military spouses out there that have moved many, many more times than me. Every move has been so different for us– by car, by plane, by rental RV. Twice we’ve been given a last-minute change of orders to a completely different country let alone state! And a year in our child’s life brings great changes to how that move will effect him.

Moving is just simply: hard. And in reality, my way of dealing with illnesses and moving has been to trust God with the finances of not moving the “cheap” way. We often chose to do extra things to care for my body like paying for someone to professionally clean our rental before we check out, or like staying in hotels when the movers are packing up or before our household goods arrive to the new place.

We always have the movers unpack as much as possible and open every box in the new house, even if they put things in the wrong places, because then I won’t have to bend and reach and use my painful hands quite as much.

My body will inevitably give out anyway– adrenaline can only go so far so long during a move! But little steps can help, and I always try to find those things that I can do to care for myself.

What advice would you give someone who ill and who has a spouse in the military?

I really don’t know that I would have any advice for other chronically ill military spouses than just to cling to God–even when you’re “mad” at Him for all that is going on in your life and body. He will show you the way to go– what church to go to or not, what new friend to pursue or not.

He will love you with an everlasting love. “You number my wanderings; Put my tears into Your bottle; Are they not in Your book?” Psalm 56:8 (NKJV)

Thank you so much, for sharing, Erin. I have a lot of admiration how you seem to handle it all with grace. Thank you for serving our country through supporting your husband and traveling all over where he is sent.

Even though I’ve known Angela Dugi for only a short while, I have come to think of Angie as a dear friend and soul mate as we both travel on the road of chronic illness. I watched her struggle just to have the energy and focus to answer my questions. Every second is precious to her because she doesn’t know how long that second will last before she needs to rest. Her book, What I Learned Lying Down: Hope for the Chronically Ill gives an intimate look into her private journal as she shares how God used her illnesses for good during this fourteen-year pilgrimage.

Living with chronic fatigue, lupus, rheumatoid arthritis, fibromyalgia, osteoporosis, and asthma–all while being a wife and mom to three children–is life-challenging to say the least! But, as Angie says, “To be fixated on the pain that accompanies a chronic illness is effortless–the challenge lies in looking for the treasures that are hidden in the midst of the pain.”

That right there pretty much sums up why Angie wanted to write this book. She wanted to share what God has shown her as she lay at His feet during those frustrating and hard times.

According to Angie, this book was never her idea. She had never written anything substantial up until this point. But she clearly felt God’s prompting as He woke her up at 2AM one morning. She strongly felt these words in her spirit, “I want you to start writing, and I want you to write the end of the story first, of how I healed you [spiritually].” She started journaling the very next day.

She kept a journal for three years before she sensed God telling her to start organizing her thoughts into a book format.

It was such a privilege to interview Angie (as she told me to call her right away). We connected on such a deep level, as all fellow sufferers seem to do. She is one of the most encouraging people I’ve ever met. She’s been through so much and continues to go through so much, and yet she is willing to help encourage others who may need it. Angie hopes this book will encourage and comfort the sick and give them hope that is only found in Christ!

If you are in a dark valley right now and need some encouragement to help you travel on your own road of illness (or maybe you are watching loved ones go through this migration), this is one book you have to read. As I turned each page, I became more and more engrossed in her life. I cried and laughed right along with her. God did touch me through her words. May He do the same for you!

You can find her book, What I Learned Lying Down: Hope for the Chronically Ill by Angela Dugi at Amazon.com (and other major internet booksellers). The Amazon Kindle version is also now available as well.

Bridget Gazlay is a freelance writer and artist (and is also chronically ill). She resides in West Michigan. www.pfccreations.com . ** Watch for more articles in coming weeks from Bridget as she shares the highlights of what she has learned through her conversations with Angela!

We shared the story of Matt Krueger previously on our web site in April 2011. His story was recently on Christian Broadcasting Network.

Matt says, “They did a great job on the piece! We are blessed to share God’s story with the World and are interested in sharing the music and message with more. . . I never thought I would be on the same program as John Tesh or Pat Robertson… LOL. God works in wonderful ways.”

At the age of 22, when Matt had a heart scan, he was told by his doctors he needed immediate surgery or he could have a heart attack. He married his girlfriend, and at the age of 27 had 6 stents inserted into his heart to open up the blocked arteries.

This is a beautiful 5-minute video I encourage you to watch. You will be encouraged, maybe shed a few tears with Matt’s wife, and see what god has done in his life.

Matt shares in the broadcast, “Life is shorter than we think and none of us want to think about death, but it will come to all of us… He just wants us, going forward, to continue to love Him and to grow in Him, so that when we get to that judgement day we’ve done what we can on this earth for Him and we can spend the rest of eternity with Him.”

Listen to some of >Matt Krueger’s music here.

Lisa

The Story Behind The Prayer Dove

When I found out that I had MS I felt that part of me was gone for ever! Being a person who always did for myself, never asking for help of any kind, feeling that even God had forgotten me. . . Well, I had a pity party for myself. Through kind words of others, cards, encouraging letters, and much prayer from those who cared about me and my family, I found my hope renewed.

With some changes in my life style I realized that God had not forgotten me that He indeed was going to help me use what I was going through to help others.

One morning, during my quiet time, I came across a passage in Romans. I had read these verses many times, but this time these words made my heart jump for joy. Romans 8:26-27 says, “And the Holy Spirit helps us in our distress. For we don’t even know what we should pray for, nor how we should pray. But the Holy Spirit prays for us with groanings that cannot be expressed in words. And the Father who knows all hearts knows what the Spirit is saying, for the Spirit pleads for us believers in harmony with God’s own will.”

It was on my heart at that instant that I needed to carve a dove, a symbol of the Holy Spirit, that would fit in the palm of ones hand and Romans 8:26-27 needed to be inscribed on the dove.

This could be used by those going through trials of this world and give them the encouragement they needed to live on for Christ and the journey that is planned for each of our lives. I want to bring others to Christ and finish this race that is set before me. My hope is that the dove can touch others who need the encouragement and also those who have never heard of our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ!

The Prayer Dove might be the perfect gift for a friend who needs comfort or for yourself, when facing a trial on your journey!
God Bless,
Going the Distance,
Kathy Myers Nave

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I recently had the blessed experience of chatting briefly with book author Cindy Tuttle, who has written “Joining in the Dance of Life” and recently released “Finding the Light of Jesus” both available at Amazon.com and Barnes and Noble.

I feel privileged to share this interview with you about her new book.

Cindy, please tell us a little about yourself and what inspired you to write “Finding the Light of Jesus.”

Thank you, Debbi, for letting me share “The Light of Jesus” with you. I have been honored to have worked with people with severe mental illness for over twenty-five years. I’ve also worked with adults and children who were profoundly retarded and people who are elderly living in long term care hospitals. They taught me so much about how to live our faith.

As a child I was sexually abused and almost killed by two teenagers. Because of that and other abuse I went through some very rough times. Getting counseling and my faith brought me through and I am SO grateful!!

I have been involved in many ministries in my church including lecturer, choir, home visits, prayer leader, religious education, Eucharistic minister, etc. I completed four years of lay ministry classes.

I have been fortunate to have been published in thirteen periodicals and have a book recently published called Finding the Light of Jesus by Crosslink Publishing.

As I mentioned I am so grateful for what Jesus has done for me.

I would be constantly yearning for love from others. That is why I wrote Finding the Light of Jesus. To share what I have been given with people who might be hurting and/or want to grow in Christian faith.

What is the key message in your book that you would like your readers to grasp?

The key message is – no matter how we feel or what situation we are in, Jesus calls us to be His beloved child. Once we experience this love we then have a strong desire to live the love we have been given.

Has your background in human services, as well as your lay-work in Spiritual retreats influenced your thoughts in your writing? If so can you share a little with us “How you feel this to be the case and why”?

They have had a strong influence in my writing. The spiritual wisdom I have learned from people with severe disabilities is incredible. They have taught me what is really important. What we need is not necessarily what we want. What culture says is important at times is not the truth. When people have severe pain as the people have in your ministry, they find the true gifts that give life and love.

In facilitating my spiritual retreats one person was at the beginning stages of dementia yet the care and respect given her by the other people at the retreat and the spiritual wisdom she shared I will never forget. She seemed so grateful that she was being heard and the love given her. Her smile during the retreat still warms my heart every time I think of it. She wasn’t seen as a patient but as our brother and sister in Christ. What a wonderful day that was! Experiences like this helps shape my writing.

What made you chose the title: “Finding the Light of Jesus”?

I chose the title because the light of Jesus is everywhere and sometimes we may forget how close His light is. To me His light is compassion, strength, faith, and the eternal light of our soul. Experiencing or finding that light is joy beyond words. I never tire of hearing people tell of these experiences. In fact that might be my next book.

Finally to round up, Can you let our readers know “why” you feel they should purchase your book and what they might expect to gain as a result?

We all feel lonely at times and have challenges in our faith and trying to live out our faith. Finding the Light of Jesus offers a variety of ways to help us in our faith. The prayers settle our hearts and souls so we are open to read the reflections in a prayerful mindset. I give suggestions on how we can live our faith and also provide pages for journalism. I have prayers towards the middle of the book for times when we are lonely.

I also have a part called “Conversations With Jesus.” I provide a dialog of some of the feelings we have and how Jesus might respond. If you want a book that includes spiritual reflections, prayers that touch the soul, clear suggestions for living our faith, and a book that is ideal for prayer groups, support groups, churches, religious education, and Christian social service programs, this is the book for you!You can find the link on www.cindytuttletheauthor.com. If you are a group leader this is a very helpful book for a lesson plan and reflection questions and prayers that will generate a prayerful environment and spiritual insight.

To discover more about this Cindy and her new book please visit her web-site and click here to view the promo from her book: “Joining in the Dance of Life”

Debbi Farmer is a retired homeschool teaching mom, who presently has opened her fun-dream “small business” even while facing many health challenges in her life. Debbi has worked many years with Rest Ministries in both the “Beyond Surviving Homeschool” forums as well as writing devotionals for the “Chronic Illness” forum. She has had many short stories, devotionals, as well as poems and gospel songs published over the years, and is now presently enjoying life with her husband of almost 30 years, walking where the Lord leads us.

I recently had the blessed experience of chatting briefly with Sherry Boettcher author of “Living a Meaningful Life” She has had such a good response from her readers, as well as many testimonials that inspire others to read and share her book.

Sherry, thank you for taking time to speak to me today, can you tell us a little about yourself and why you felt led to write the book “Living a Meaningful Life”?

Thank you, Debbi. Oh, how it breaks my heart that there are so many of us who hurt, but I’m so glad we can encourage one another and that God offers us all hope! I guess one of the most encouraging things for me has been the response from readers, giving me the affirmation that my book is touching hurting hearts and truly giving them hope and encouragement.

I’ll start by saying my name is Sherry Boettcher and I have had fibromyalgia from birth. I was diagnosed at the age of 18 and I nearly died from complications in 1998 which landed me in a wheelchair for several years. Though I’ve never felt well, and I face pain and many challenges each day, I feel that my life has been very blessed.

I love to do art work (when able), talk on the phone (with a head set), spend time with my husband and our two dogs, and spend time with God and in His word. God’s wonderful care, love, and provision through extreme difficulty is what inspired me to write “Living a Meaningful Life.”

The thought that there were others who were going through the same things, perhaps without the comfort of being understood, believed, and loved, helped me persevere. It took me four years from start to finish. I just kept thinking, “If I can reach one person with God’s comfort and love, if one life can be saved from the ruin, it will be worth it all!” The letters I have received have indeed made it worth while!

What is the key message you would like your readers to grasp?

The key message I want readers to grasp when reading my book is that they are priceless, that they have great value, and that their value is never affected by there limitations. They are not alone and that there are others who understand, believe, and care. And that most of all, God understands, cares, and experiences their suffering right along with them!

What inspired you to chose the title “Living a Meaningful Life”?

I chose the title “Living a Meaningful Life” because that is what I believe each one of us can have, no matter what our limitations! I may not be rich or have the perfect health I wish for, but my life if full of blessing and abiding comfort. God gives me comfort and joy even during the most trying times and that is what makes my life worth living. Sharing the secret to happiness and hope is what I want to share with my readers!

Can you tell us a bit more about your book and little about some of the reader’s responses to your book?

My goal in life is to give hope to others who are hurting, by offering understanding, encouragement, practical advice, and hope. I believe there is hope, because God is coming soon to take all who choose Him to a world where we will never ever be sick again and we will get to do so much more than we ever could have here! Praise God!

I want to offer hope to others, because I know what it is like to be sick, tired, and in pain, and I would want others to do the same for me. Please know that writing is hard for me, like emails etc., but I enjoy encouraging others on the phone when ever possible.

Just the other day I had the privilege to talk with a lady who had just read my book, she was so encouraged and said she felt like I was an old friend, that my book had given her such comfort, hope, and re-assurance that what she suffered was not imaginary and that someone understood.

Another lady contacted me whose friend had lent her a copy of my book. She is in her sixties and suffers immensely, but said my book had been such a comfort and inspiration to her that she had read it three times and now wanted her own copy!

It truly gives me great joy to know that my little book can make such a great difference in the lives of others who are hurting. God is so good and He cares for us all! My heart is filled with gratitude to Him, for allowing me the joy of encouraging others, even though it has meant I must walk the same painful path.

Thank you Sherry! I am sure there will be many who will be truly blessed by reading your book. God bless you.

Debbi Farmer is a retired homeschool teaching mom, who presently has opened her fun-dream “small business” even while facing many health challenges in her life. Debbi has worked many years with Rest Ministries in both the “Beyond Surviving Homeschool” forums as well as writing devotionals for the “Chronic Illness” forum. She has had many short stories, devotionals, as well as poems and gospel songs published over the years, and is now presently enjoying life with her husband of almost 30 years, walking where the Lord leads us.

You can find out more at Sherry’s web site, Hope4Hurting. Rest Ministries does not specifically endorse this book, as our founder has not yet read it personally.