10 Tips to Avoid Your Illness Support Group Becoming Depressing

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If you live with a chronic illness or chronic pain, the odds are that you have at least tried a support group once since your diagnosis. Did the situation go something like this? You felt awful the entire day but you decided to get in the car and go to the support group anyway. You thought it would be good for you. It took forever to find the building at the hospital and then you ended up parking what seemed like a mile from the suite number. You found a chair that smelled like old sweat and smoke and hoped somehow you would find some encouragement. But an hour later you're ready to make dash for the door. Everyone seems to be so depressed! And too many people want to either sell you a juicer that is sure to cure your problems, or … [Read more...]

Find a Church That Understands Disabilities

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If you are looking for a church that is more likely to understand your physical limitations, including illness, cancer, or disabilities, Joni and Friends is an excellent resource. This international Christian ministry has an updated list of churches around the USA who have shared their desire to create an environment that welcomes those who may be "differently-abled." To enter your zipcode into the search engine click here. You may also want to visit our HopeKeepers map to see if there is a church near you who has a HopeKeepers group that serves the chronically ill. … [Read more...]

What To Do For Those Who Are Hurting When You Don’t Know What To Do

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As the holidays approach more people than usual are looking for ways to reach out to help a hurting friend. Sadly, this shouldn't be a seasonal event, but something we do all year round. But most people just don't know how to do that reaching out! Well, thanks to a wonderful book we don't have that excuse any longer! One of my all-time favorite books is The Art of Helping: What to Say and Do When Someone is Hurting by Lauren Littauer Briggs. In fact, I am very honored to have a section in it for those with chronic illness. But the whole book is helpful for those of us who, well, care. And it is one of the few books I believe should be on the desk of every pastor and church secretary! So much so that when it was first published we … [Read more...]

Testimony: Why Do Churches Need HopeKeepers Small Group Ministries?

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In coming months I will be sharing more of your testimonies about your involvement in small groups, the Sunroom, on Facebook, daily devotionals--wherever Rest Ministries has touched your life. Print, audio, or videos are all welcome if you're interested in sharing. Lisa From a woman we will call Samantha, who has been a part of a HopeKeepers in Southern California that has met for over 10 years. I was a young Christian woman, just starting my career, newly in love, and full of hopes for the future. Then, one day, chronic pain entered my life and set up a long-term stay. Now, over 20 years later, I live in constant severe pain. Do I have many moments of questioning, tears and frustration? If I said I didn't, I'd be giving false … [Read more...]

Why, As Christians, We Must Go Beyond “You Look So Good!”

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I recently had a pastor asked me, "If someone comes to church who is chronically ill and they have not looked great recently, and now they look better than usual, is it not okay to then say 'You look so good'?" I thought about it for a moment and replied, "Well, if it was me, I would think, 'Gee, I must have been looking really terrible!' As much as I intellectually know it is a compliment, it would not make me feel good, but rather worse about myself." "I understand what you're saying," said another woman. "Because it is still a comment on our outward appearance." Scripture tells us, "The Lord does not look at the things man looks at. Man looks at the outward appearance, but the Lord looks at the heart.” (1 Samuel 16:7) When we … [Read more...]

7 Secrets the Chronically Ill Want Chaplains to Know

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By Lisa Copen 1. Have a sense of humor about my illness if I do. I know you're trained to search for if I'm in denial, but sometimes a good laugh about a situation or health challenge is my way of coping so feel free to laugh with me. 2. I will likely tell you I go to church more often than I do. You're a chaplain, so I have to sound somewhat disciplined if I am a spiritual person, right? (Never mind that lying to you isn't exactly "spiritual.") Honestly, as much as I may want to go, I get there a lot less. If you have any way to get my church to put the service online or on a free CD I will listen to it. 3. Skip the platitudes. You probably already know that but it's easy for anyone to slip into saying things like "God won't … [Read more...]

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