An antiseptic smell I couldn’t quite place permeated the air. Perhaps it was a combination of Pine Sol and Clorox. Industrial carpet woven in blues and reds needed a vacuum. A lone ant traveled by my foot. I took the damp tissue in my hand and squashed it. A few fluorescents created shadows which revealed the starkness of the room. The barren environment mimicked the fact that I was the only occupant waiting.

It was the middle of the night, and I lay curled on my side wondering if my husband was going to live through surgery.

I also–possibly selfishly, yet realistically–wondered if my body would allow me to make it through the ordeal. Having postural intolerance, chronic fatigue syndrome, and fibromyalgia severely limit how much time I can be out of bed each day. Normal, everyday activities for most people, like driving to a hospital and sitting for any length of time, are a challenge for me. Doing it for hours is virtually impossible.

My life had taken on a surreal quality since the midnight phone call. A stranger had informed me that Mike was being life flighted back home from Boy Scout Camp. Was I really lying on a hospital floor hoping my body would hold out until I could get information on Mike? Maybe I should call my sister to come sit with me, but we were arguing. What about, I couldn’t remember.

All I knew was I was alone—too alone. For moments I’d seem okay, like I was holding it together; then, the realness of the situation would come over me like the feeling you get when you jump into a pool on your first day of summer vacation. You know the water will be cold, but it’s still a shock. You can’t believe you’ve gone from dripping sweat to shivering violently in the space of seconds. I tried to make sense of the frigid water, but I couldn’t. I wanted back on dry land.

My bible lay open to Psalm 23, yet all I could do was scan the words as my mind flitted about. A bottle of Gatorade with salt packets I’d asked the E.R. nurse for sat beside it. I must have left my baggie of salt at home. My cell phone, a wad of tissues and purse surrounded me. The shawl I wore for writing was draped over my chest. It reminded me of home which helped to alleviate the uneasiness of my surroundings. How much longer would I have to wait? I was trying to keep from panicking; trying to keep it together. It was a battle I was beginning to lose.

I started flipping pages in my Bible. Okay, Lord, I need some help here. I’m scared. My eyes settled on Psalm 63:8 “My soul clings to You; Your right hand upholds me.”

I am clinging to you, God. Since I am doing that, I am going to trust Your Word that says You will uphold me. You know how I struggle with trusting You. I am weak, but You are strong. I need You, Lord. I can’t do this alone. I know that all power in heaven and earth is Yours. I’m asking You to allow Mike to stay with me. I need him. The kids need him. I’m begging You. I also know that Mike is Yours, not mine. So, for me to have peace, I surrender the love of my life into Your hands. If You take him home, I will be angry and grief stricken. But, if that is Your plan, help me to accept it. I can’t do any of this alone. I’m afraid, Jesus. Amen.

As I opened my eyes, I noticed that nothing around me had changed. The waiting room was still bathed in glowing light. Disinfectant hung heavy in the air. There was not another person in sight. And, yet, I felt different.

A tinge of peace subdued my fearful thoughts. The burden I’d been carrying on my own had eased. I felt a little freer, a little lighter. Talking with God had transferred the enormity of the situation from my limited, human hands to His powerful ones.

Honestly, I was still scared, still anxious. But, I didn’t feel alone anymore. I didn’t feel so overwhelmed. I knew God was in this with me, and that He would help me face whatever was to come. So, I did the next thing I could. I took a deep breath, gathered my soggy tissues, and went to find someone who could give me an update about Mike.

By the way, my story has a happy ending. I was able to stay at the hospital until Mike was admitted to a private room following surgery. Since that time, he has made a full recovery.

Dana Kennedy is a survivor, encourager, wife and mother. She writes a devotional column for Glory and Strength e-magazine. It has taken Dana the better part of 17 years to begin to understand the gifts God has hidden for her in chronic illness, especially Himself. Dana welcomes your contact at dtearosee@earthlink.net

Has your “healthy” spouse had a medical issue, such as a stroke, cancer, an accident, that left you reeling, wondering how things would “work out”? How did you handle the uncertainty?

One dear-lady on one of the prayer forums I visit requested prayer for her church and a member of this church. This church-member suffers from Multiple Chemical Sensitivities, one of the illnesses we refer to as an “invisible illness” because we can not actually see the results of the damage this illness can cause. Since there is little known about this disorder, the church members took it upon themselves to intervene and try to heal this member in their own way.

Rather than offering support and prayer, they offered her what they assumed was a “sure-fire”cure.

They felt that this lady was not “physically” ill as she had said but rather suffering from sin in her life. They offered her a book that has chemicals on it to help her overcome her problems. The idea is basically that the more she smells the chemicals in this book, the more she will realize that her illness is and has been all in her imagination.

It always breaks my heart when others pass judgment on those who are in pain. . .
Well-meaning church-members assume they have the answers.
Well-meaning friends offer their cures, remedies and advice.
Well-meaning family members don’t understand why we are in pain.

Soon, we find ourselves questioning our life and illness and wondering if sin has been the reason we suffer so. In John chapter nine, we see a similar situation. The disciples saw a blind man. This blind man had suffered all of his life. The disciples ask Jesus who had sinned, him or his parents that he might have such an affliction. Jesus replied neither had sinned.

You see, it does not please God that we suffer, The Lord desires only the best for us, but the Lord can see past our pain in this temporary life to the eternal gain we will someday receive. This man’s weakness was displaying his spiritual strength, by relying on the Lord to work through him.God’s grace was the power for this blind man to endure his burden. He was strengthened as he relied on the strength of the Lord in his life. God’s powerful grace is more real to us in our sufferings. God’s glory could be demonstrated by working through the human weakness.

I know that when my pain is deep and intense and I am so troubled, despaired and alone, I would like to have an interceding friend who is concerned enough to pray for me and with me.

I would like a friend who would listen and understand.
I have that friend today in Jesus.
He is a friend I can always turn to.
He understands me through and through.
What kind of a friend are you today?

Can you intercede for another in pain? Perhaps you need prayer and understanding today in your own life. Remember precious one, you are so loved today and you are not alone. The Lord does understand and He knows your pain.

Dear Lord: Thank You for reminding us it is not our fault that we suffer so. Please help us to forgive ourselves and take away any guilt that is misplaced. You demonstrated in Your Word that this world offers pain because the world is flawed, but that we as individuals are not at fault when illness strikes. We can be blessed and assured that you understand the pain we are in and we are grateful to find any relief through You and Your Word! Thank you, Lord. Amen.

About the author:
Deborah Farmer suffers daily from a few of those invisible illnesses. She desires that everyone in pain today feel the loving arms of a Savior who understands and loves them. Deborah offers her prayers and hugs to you today!

You can now read this on your Kindle. Find out more at http://TodaysDevotionOnKindle.com

Have you ever been hurt by a well-meaning person who offered a quick cure or solution to your physical ailments? Did you hurt about it even more than your loved ones would have expected? How have you used this experience to respond differently when you are encouraging another person who is suffering?

What is the hardest part of living with a chronic illness? Well, it depends on who you are asking, what time of day you are asking, and a million other factors. Yet, we all have so much in common and we can understand the challenges of the friend beside us even if we don’t deal with it ourselves. We all feel “called” to certain things, and not being able to do them–from homeschooling to making dinner–is difficult when we don’t feel we can do what we, and others, expect from our self. And the fact that it is invisible . . . well, that makes many of the struggles even more painful as we feel we must justify a housekeeper or a parking placard.

We asked you, “What is the hardest part of living with illness?” and here are your responses. As you read through them, be sure to send up a prayer for our brave participants who shared their hearts.

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“One of the hardest parts is that chronic illness seems to present an opposite picture of my character. For example, I am fairly organized, love keeping my home running smoothly, making home cooked food, and having a reasonably tidy house. Because I do not have the capacity to keep my house very tidy at times and unable to clean very much, people have judged me as being lazy and unorganized and this really has hurt me very deeply.” Lee, chronic fatigue syndrome

“Missing out on so many activities because of my illness. Your healthy friends say to you ‘let me know what I can do for you,’ but you don’t hear from them. You make the most of the days that you have because you know it is a gift from God and it is to be treasured and you do not when it will be gone.” Carla, multiple sclerosis, chronic pain

“Having more dreams than I have physical ability. I’m learning how to chase my dreams in different ways.” Kathy, mixed connective tissue disease, diabetes, and more

“People forget and assume you should be doing more than you are. Or you have to explain over and over again why you need to space out the tasks you take on, over a longer period of time to allow for flare ups and to keep from really crashing. Also, lack of sleep associated with uncontrolled pain and neurological symptoms takes a heavy toll on my emotional state and relationships.” Sherri, lupus, fibromyalgia, rheumatoid arthritis, Sjogren’s

“The hardest part of living with a chronic illness is not being able to do the same things other people your age are doing. I’m only 24 and have had this illness since I was born. I’ve never been able to run and play sports like the other kids my age. I always had to sit on the sidelines and watch, which wasn’t all bad. It was fun to sit there and cheer for my friends, but I can’t deny feeling a little left out.” Erin, multiple hereditary exotoses

“Friends and family think you are doing well cause you look good from the outside, but your body is hurting every day from the inside where no one can see.” Evelyn, chronic pancreatites

“Personally, I am not one to talk openly about my mental illness. Of course there is stigma surrounding mental illness and that impairs communication, but that is not why I “choose” to remain silent. I don’t want to call attention to my illness for fear I will be considered “weak” yet my greatest need is to be able to talk about it without fear of judgment. I could, however, explain any misconceptions about my particular illness and about chronic illness in general if I felt “safe” enough to express that which is kept hidden. I feel I only add to the misunderstanding of living with invisible illness because I am hesitant to talk about it. I want to help others better understand invisible chronic illness, and in doing so, I think that I will feel more secure with my own.” No name given

“There are many hard things about living with chronic illness. What I consider ‘the hardest’ changes from time to time, but one thing that’s really bothering me right now is the looks I get when I pull into a handicap parking spot with my state-issued PH plates and get out with my three kids and walk into a store. I do NOT LOOK SICK in any way and I feel like people are judging me, thinking I’m abusing the plates, maybe questioning if they are even mine. They have no clue about the pain I’m feeling with every step, the exhausted effort I’m putting forth simply to get through this trip to purchase groceries to feed my family. They don’t know that even if I can make it into the store alright, that by the time I’ve checked out I’ll be staggering back to my van, ever-so-greatful that it’s close enough to the door that I can make it there without throwing up from the nausea and fatigue I’m struggling under.” Jennifer, chronic fatigue syndrome, fibromyalgia, endometriosis, PCOS

“I am 70 years old and really want to enjoy my remaining years. I have a handicap emblem for my car which I use ‘as needed.’” Jerry, peripheral neuropathy

“When we go somewhere like Disney I can walk almost normally first thing on the morning; my wife is not handicapped. People look at us, and have often commented as to why we feel we deserve to park so close, when they have to walk so far. Of course they are not around later as I slowly make my way back to our van. But the hardest part goes beyond the invisible illness to the fact that I own my illnesses. Diabetes, neuropathy and the related depression which require large amount of medications, and still are incurable and limit my former active life style. I have found that volunteering my time and efforts to help others deal with like problems has helped me deal with my own.” Name withheld

“Working, I’m in so much pain all the time, but working at a job really makes the pain go way up.” Cindy, arthritis, neuropathy

“It is hard to pick just one thing that is the hardest part of living with a chronic illness. I think loss is the hardest part for me. Loss of health, loss of the ability to move about freely, loss of friends, loss of the ability to work, loss of self confidence, loss of financial security.” Ruth, young onset Parkinson’s, fibromyalgia, osteo arthritis

“The hardest part, hands down, is having to deal with family members who don’t believe, who doubt and test and constantly tell you what you are experiencing isn’t real and you’re faking it. Then if you have a good day – heaven forbid you should have a good day! – and can do anything you normally can’t, it is taken as ‘proof’ that your illnesses are fake. It’s a lose-lose situation.” Sharon, arthritis, asthma, fibromyalgia, allergies

“The up and down of daily living. It’s hard to plan anything. You take one day at a time. You can’t think about what others are thinking, when they see you do things one day and then are bedridden the next. They do not understand. I do not understand. I do know that God’s unfailing love is there for me and my family continues to stand there for me. Praise God!” Carla, multiple sclerosis

“The hardest part is the invisible part. I have people say I can’t be sick as they can’t see it or that it is different from others. And they can get really uptight about it all. They don’t understand when fatigue just overwhelms me, I should be able to keep doing everything! HELP!” Lee, arthritis, fibro, migraines, headaches, asthma, IBS, etc

“The hardest part of living with an invisible illness, isn’t the fact that its invisible. I have a wonderful family and wonderful friends. If you don’t believe me, I don’t care. You do not make an impact in my life, you do not live with me, and you do not help support me. Anything that is said hurts, but is soon forgotten.” Christine, reflex sympathetic dystrophy, complex regional pain syndrome

“What hurts the worse is when my invisible illness allows me a good moment, and my son shows so much joy in that moment, and then the next moment I can’t even get out of bed. No two moments are ever the same, and even though I look like I could go out and play at any moment, my son will never know if my invisible illness is so bad that just coming to ask me causes me to snap.” No name given

“Being judged for what can’t be seen. I am overweight, so the standard response I get from people is if I’d lose the weight, I’d feel better. That’s like asking ‘Which came first, the chicken or the egg?’” Doreen, rheumatoid arthritis, fibromyalgia

“I think it is seeing people you haven’t seen in a while and them expecting you to be your old self.” Nancy, rheumatoid arthritis and tendonitis

“Being ignored/insulted/neglected by medical world, which makes everyone else think your illness must not be real. I guess it’s other people’s doubt about your suffering, and the resulting loneliness.” Sheila, lupus, fibromyalgia, chronic fatigue syndrome, diabetes, trigeminal neuralgia

“Having so many things that I would like to do and not enough energy to do them. The energy problem also affects my ability to be social and to have less isolation. I guess this is two things, not one, but the isolation is really hard.” Sherri, fibromyalgia, orthostatic hypotension, Hashimoto’s disease
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“The hardest part of living with a chronic illness is having to cut back on the amount of housework I can do. I had to cut back on activities that I used to such as church activities and not to mention being able to go on long trips and vacations with my family. But God has been good and He is helping to hang in there.” Vickie, fibromyalgia, panic and nerves eisorders

“Unrealistic expectations of me. My current family and extended family ‘angry’ that I can’t do the things I used to. ‘I want my Mother back,’ stated my daughter.” Bob and Mary Ellen, fibromyalgi, myofacial pain, arthritis, IBS, asthma, severe depression, anxiety, nerve pain from neuromas (feet), etc.

“I am 59 but look at least 10 years younger and I try to look my best at all times, so the hardest part of living with the invisible illnesses is my own perceptions of myself. Some days I feel almost normal and then I think maybe I am getting well. I look in the mirror and expect more of myself even though I am well aware of how I feel on many other days. I have a hard time balancing fighting for my health and leading as normal a life as possible, spending time with my husband, grandchildren, children, friends, run my home, wonder about having ministry influence, and yet accept where the Lord has me.” Sheryl, chronic myofascial pain, plantar fascitis, IBS, spinal curvatures

“I think the hardest part of living with an invisible chronic illness is that people don’t believe that you are as sick as you say you are. It took six years and many doctors and tests to finally get a diagnosis for my fibromyalgia. And just last year, I found a doctor that understands ALL of the issues that go along with having a headache all day every day. It’s bad enough when your family and friends don’t believe you. But, when the medical community turns their back on you and ignores you that really effects your self-worth.” Carrie, chronic saily headache, migraines, and fibromyalgia

“I have only been a Christian for seven years and I am glad that I have my firm foundation to support me during my rough times. I don’t know what plans God has for me, but I know that ‘He will use my pain to birth my passion’ as Beth Moore put it.” No name given

“I am 55, and older people actually tell me I look okay, even though I am walking poorly, or sometimes with a cane or walker. I get nasty comments when I park in disabled space, legally of course. Am a lot different person when I come out of store however–look and feel like someone else. Elderly don’t believe me when I say I collect SSDI for 5 years now, worked all my life, then disabilities much worse. Have bad days and worse, no one understands chronic pain, esp when you are under 60, have had juvenile RA since age 15, but only slowed me down a bit, always active until my late 40′s. Typical progression according to docs., not unusual to have other things added to bad bones and muscles. even church going do not understand my inability to go there, to drive much, or do simple things they can do. very frustrating. very lonely. I am a widow – have 4 grown kids and 5 grands. I see on and off.” Marjorie, juvenille rheumatoid arthritis, lupus other spinal probs, fibromyalgia, asthma, blood disorder, chronic pain

“I think the hardest part is probably that people don’t understand. You look fine, so they have expectations about how you should be able to behave, or what you should do, when they really have no idea how difficult things might be for you. If you try to explain, you look like you are making excuses.” Fiona, chronic back and neck pain

“The hardest part is to be left behind from my family. (Especially during the summer trips!). I am unable to travel or enjoy most activities, so my hubby takes the kids out to enjoy their summer. I’m left behind realizing how lonely it is to be so sick, a lot of the time! I can’t enjoy my beautiful children and see their smiles as they enjoy an amusement park, family reunion, etc.” Kelley, degenerative disk disease, endometriosis, severe joint pain, severe chemical and food allergies

“The hardest part for me is that my own adult daughter still thinks of me as being young and strong and I’m almost 57 years old; yet I feel like I’m 90. I’ve been a single parent since she was three years old and raised her without one penny of child support. She doesn’t understand the pain and exhaustion that I go through every day. I’ve had Fibromyalgia and Chronic Fatigue since 1991 which were both brought on after I was in a car accident. However, eight months ago, I became extremely ill and lost 40 pounds in 1 1/2 months. I had to go to the emergency room 4 times in one month and had 5 IVs due to severe dehydration. I still don’t have a diagnosis as to what was wrong and I underwent numerous medical procedures. I’m still recovering from the illness that had me nearly bedridden for two weeks straight. It took me five months to finally get an appointment with my primary doctor (I had to see nurses prior to that).” Barbara, fibromyalgia, osteo-arthritis, asthma, herniated disks, migraines, IBS, chronic fatigue syndrome

“The hardest part of living with invisible illness is slowly watching the World go by, and see people leave your life. The L O N G sleepless nights filled with prayer and innermost moanings to a God you can’t feel right now. Your memories of able-bodied days Your knowledge that your loved ones are tired of dealing with your illness and knowing you’re a burden.” Jill, 3 spinal surgeries, diabetes, epilepsy, gastroparesis, degenerative disc disease, ostioparosis, nuropathies, etc.

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So, what can we do with all of the emotions? What do YOU do to get OVER those feelings of not getting everything on your list done, or frustrations of having to explain why your house isn’t clean? Remember Joshua 1:9: “Have I not commanded you? Be strong and courageous. Do not be terrified; do not be discouraged, for the Lord your God will be with you wherever you go.” How can we turn these emotions from discouragement and fear into strength and courage?

“Why does God want us to be afraid of Him?” asked my sweet son recently. We were reading a scripture and it mentioned how we should fear the Lord. This is a question that most of us have asked at one time or another, and one we don’t always get a satisfactory answer. I mean, God tells us He is our Father, our Abba, our friend, our protector. . . and then on the other hand He wants us to be afraid of Him? What kind of friend does that?

When we live with a chronic illness we are up against all sorts of things that we can fear. We fear going to the doctor, we fear not going to the doctor. We fear taking the medications and dealing with side effects, we fear not taking the medications and coping with the possibly damaging results to our body. The list can go on and on. Why on earth would God want us to add Him to that list of fears?

The amplified version of the Bible says, “The secret [of the sweet, satisfying companionship] of the Lord have they who fear (revere and worship) Him, and He will show them His covenant and reveal to them its [deep, inner] meaning.”

According to Merriam Webster’s Dictionary, “revere” means to “show devoted deferential honor to: regard as worthy of great honor.” When we fear the Lord, it is meant to be because we fully comprehend He is to be given such great honor.

We are to acknowledge that this God in our lives is the same God who said ‘Let there be light” (Genesis 1:3) and there was light. . . and this light was not even the sun, which He created three days later (Genesis 1:6). God is all powerful–and loving, and yet, He also can be vengeful when the situation is appropriate for this (Romans 12:19). In Psalm 6:1 David pleads “O Lord, rebuke me not in your anger, nor discipline me in your wrath.”

To acknowledge that God is God and He has the right to rebuke or discipline, can be one of the ways we “fear God.” I believe that God wants the best for me. I can expect, should expect, that there will be consequences when I start taking Him for granted, when I let my priorities slip out of order, when I spend money foolishly, when I forget to tell Him thank you for the things He has blessed me with. As my grandma used to say, “You’re getting to big for those britches.” God has a way of drawing us back to Him, and sometimes that path is full of a lot of potholes!

I like the simple version of this scripture from The Messages. It states, “God-friendship is for God-worshipers; They are the ones He confides in.” When we worship Him, remember His glory and honor Him, we create a friendship and from that He shares some of the mysteries to help us through those difficult days. We can see how He works out our messes into miracles; though our circumstances may have been the same, we likely would not have seen His hand, if we were lacking being in communion with Him.

Prayer: Lord, fearing You is having a healthy respect, a reverance to You who created the heavens and the earth–and me! It is recalling how You never leave my side through the good times and the bad. Humble me so that I have a healthy fear of You in ways that will strengthen our relationship, not add stress to it.

About the Author:
Lisa Copen is an author, speaker, and the founder of Rest Ministries which serves the chronically ill. She lives in San Diego with her husband and 8-year-old son. She is currently writing a book for Christian moms who live with chronic illness. If you are interested in sharing your stories, feedback and confessions for the book, visit her Facebook page at http://MomWithIllness.com .

You can now read this on your Kindle. Find out more at http://TodaysDevotionOnKindle.com

When you hear that we should “fear” God, what comes to mind? How have you reconciled these verses? How do you express or see your “fear of the Lord”?

“Stop being angry! Turn from your rage! Do not lose your temper- it only leads to harm.” (Psalm 37:8)

Anger is a normal part of being a human being but it can be a dangerous emotion and has the potential to wreck our relationships and our lives.

Here are the four most common lies about anger.

1. When I feel angry, I must let it all out.

Too much damage has been done to people we love by blurting out angry feelings in the moment of their greatest intensity. Doing this might provide some sort of relief but it is never beneficial to the hearer or the relationship. I liken it to vomiting. You do feel better getting it out, but vomit belongs in the toilet, not on another person.

Proverbs 12:18 says, “Reckless words pierce like a sword” and Proverbs 29:11 warns us that, “Only a fool gives full vent to his anger.”

Better ways to get some relief from intense anger is to journal or pray your honest emotions to God. In the process, you might find some perspective on what to do with them and how to express them constructively.

2. Other people or provoking situations make me angry.

We all believe this lie at times. We say things like, “You make me so mad!” or “If you wouldn’t have done that, then I wouldn’t have reacted that way.”

Difficult people or situations don’t MAKE us angry, although they do tempt us. What really happens when we encounter these kinds of people is that they expose us. Jesus tells us, “It is out of the overflow of your heart, your mouth speaks.” (Luke 6:45).

What comes up and out of your mouth when you are angry exposes what’s in your heart. Often our heart is filled with self-centered lies or desires.

Start to listen to your internal self-talk when you feel angry. For example, “I can’t believe this is happening to me” or “it’s not fair, why me?” or “I need to teach him/her a lesson” or “they can’t get away with this.”

Instead of blaming others or the situation we’re in, we can start to understand what the real problem is that’s causing our anger to escalate. Our own thought life.

Then we can work to calm ourselves down (with different self talk and God’s Word) instead of demanding that life always go our way or that everyone do what we want or make us feel better.

3. I’m entitled to use my anger to get what I want if what I want is a good thing.

Anger motivates us and helps us to speak up against wrong, as well as take action to fight against injustice and evil in our world. Because it is such a powerful force however, the apostle Paul warns us not to sin in our anger (Ephesians 4:26).

Most of the time what we want is permeated with self-centered desires. We WANT our way. We want to be right. We want to be first, or catered to. We want our needs met. And we’re angry because we’re not getting what we want.

James 4:1 asks us what is the source of quarrels and conflicts among us? He says it comes because we’re not getting what we want.

Part of spiritual maturity is to learn to accept that we don’t always get what we want, even if what we want is a good thing. Living peaceably with other people involves realizing that what I want and what someone else might want may be very different. The bible tells us not to merely look out for our own interests (what we want), but also the interests of others. (Philippians 2:4).

The truth is anger is a powerful emotion that deceives us into using it to demand our own way.

4. I have always had a bad temper and this is just the way I am. I can’t change.

The good news of the gospel of Jesus Christ is that he not only redeems us but he restores us. He changes us.

If you want to get a handle on your anger, anger is not the problem you must address. Your temper is a symptom of what’s going on in your heart. If you gain self-control over your temper that’s great, but the deeper problem that causes your anger is what needs to change.

Romans 8:5 says, “Those who live according to the sinful nature have their minds set on what that nature desires; but those who live in accordance with the Spirit have their minds set on what the spirit desires.”

How we act and live flows from what is in our heart – what we desire or want the most. God wants to rearrange the desires of our heart so that we no longer want our own way the MOST, but rather we want to please him and love him and others.

When God changes our heart it’s not that we never get angry, but we no longer want to use our anger as a weapon to demand our own way, prove our point or make sure everyone knows we’re right. We don’t want to hold onto grudges, nurse resentment or harbor bitterness in our heart. Instead we want to forgive and reconcile.

When Jesus changes our heart, instead of only wanting MY way, I want to look out for the interests of others because I care about them and therefore I hold my anger in check when I’m not getting what I want and weigh that with what others might want or need.

How? I’ve had a change of heart and I no longer see myself as the most important person. I am no longer at the center of my life, Jesus is.

Becoming more and more like Jesus is not just trying to do the right thing, but wanting to do the right thing and then learning how.

James tells us to be quick to listen, slow to speak and slow to become angry, for a man’s anger (or a woman’s anger) does not produce the righteous life that God desires. (James 1:19,20)

Leslie Vernick is a licensed counselor with over 25 years of experience helping individuals, couples, and families. “Lord, I Just Want to Be Happy”. It’s received over 75 reviews and has 5 stars! This book will help you recognize and change habits that, day by day, keep you from experiencing happiness; make good choices and learn from mistakes without beating yourself up; develop the skills that will enable you to let go of negative and painful emotions quicker; and transform difficult circumstances so you can live with gratitude, joy, and purpose.

Visit Leslie’s web site to submit a question for her to answer!

Reprinted with permission, Copyright LeslieVernick.com

Trusting God’s Goodness When Fearful of Making Plans

By Ann Ferguson

“When I am afraid, I put my trust in You. In God, whose word I praise, in God I trust and am not afraid” (Psalm 56:3-4).

I often live in fear. I know I shouldn’t, but I do. I’m not so much afraid of the big picture. I have accepted fibromyalgia and chronic fatigue syndrome for what it is and I know God is in control. Mostly, I am afraid to make plans. Every time I make some significant plans, I get my hopes up, then worry that I won’t be able to participate.

I play it over in my mind a thousand times. What will I feel like when that day comes? Will I be able to go and feel well enough to enjoy? Will I go and just feel miserable? Will I not be able to go and participate at all?

Sometimes plans include some kind of commitment on my part. People depending on me to get something done.

What if I can’t deliver? What if my health fails on that day and I let people down?

Not being able to cook dinner for my family–not such a big deal. Not being able to sing at an event where thousands of people are counting on me–a big deal. I can be obsessive with these thoughts!

But worrying is pointless really. Planning is good and necessary. Worrying is, well, to put it bluntly, sin.

God has clearly asked us to bring all our worries and concerns to Him in prayer. He asks us to trust Him. Not that every time I pray I’ll magically be able to do all that I want to do, but when I pray I will be able to trust His heart. His intentions for me are good, even when I can’t see it.

As His child, nothing about my life surprises Him. If I have committed to sing somewhere and the time comes and I absolutely can’t do it, that is not a surprise to Him. If I have done everything in my power to fulfill a commitment or participate in something I’m really looking forward to (vacations, social events, performances, etc.) and the time comes where I cannot, then well, that was His plan.

Hugely disappointing? Yes! But accepting it as God’s plan takes the sting out a little.

We don’t always understand God’s will and plans for our lives. Humanly speaking it doesn’t always make sense to us. But we can be confident that He is in control. He loves us beyond what we can truly imagine. And His ways are indeed perfect. Rest in Him. Trust in His goodness, love, mercy and grace. I don’t know about you, but I’m still working on it.

Prayer: Oh, Father, forgive me for not trusting You as I should. I know You love me so much and I thank You for Your perfect ways. Help me to accept Your plan without fear and doubt. Give me grace to trust You more.

Ann Ferguson lives in Florida with her husband and five young children. She has suffered from fibromyalgia and chronic fatigue syndrome for over 15 years. Her blog “Restoring My Soul” provides spiritual inspiration and encouragement to Christians who also suffer from fibromyalgia and cfs.

Have you been hugely disappointed by not being able to attend a function you were looking forward to because of your health? How did your faith in God play into that moment? Were you able to trust His goodness? Do you sometimes live in fear of making plans, like I do? Please share with us!