“The words of the reckless pierce like swords, but the tongue of the wise brings healing.” -Proverbs 12:18

Yesterday I had a great conversation with a health and fitness coach with whom I recently started working. Not only did she give me some great ideas to work toward my personal goals, but I also found myself leaving the conversation with a lot more hope than I’ve felt in a long time. It’s interesting I should be so hopeful because I’m really having a tough time physically right now. And we also spent a fair amount of time discussing my past history of chronic illness, a topic that usually drains me and makes me sad.

Instead, she was able to focus on the accomplishments I’ve made in the past two years toward a healthier me.

I later realized my coach did a simple yet powerful thing: she used her words to bring healing–healing to my spirit and even to my body. After we spoke I was more inspired to remain on the path of a healthy lifestyle, and I was so energized by hope that I went ahead and started my new exercise program that I’ve been putting off for months because I didn’t feel well enough to try. Which, in turn, inspired me to eat healthy and work out again today. And maybe I’m imagining things, but my current flaring health symptoms seem to be better too.

Recently I’ve had a lot of reckless words spoken into my life and my health situation. Well-meaning family members, friends, and doctors have said things that to some degree, robbed me of hope, faith, and joy. It’s been a fierce battle in my heart to fight off the constant barrage of negativity their words created. What a contrast with my experience yesterday!

This is a great lesson for all of us. Before we share that “helpful” idea or something “the Lord laid on our heart” that our loved one “needs” to hear, let’s ask ourselves if we are planting seeds of hope and healing or if we are truly piercing them with the sword of our reckless words.

“Set a guard over my mouth, O Lord; keep watch over the door of my lips.” (Psalm 141:3)

About the Author: Deanna Nichols is a woman of faith searching for purpose in the midst of a lifetime of physical illness and pain. She has been diagnosed with narcolepsy with cataplexy, polycystic ovarian disease, Hashimoto’s thyroid disease, and many others. Her chronic illnesses make it impossible for her to work or even drive, so she is mostly home-bound. She is on the Board of Directors for her family’s commercial lawn maintenance business, is an avid reader and book reviewer, and uses social networking to encourage people with chronic illness, educate those without illness, as well as to share what she’s learned regarding natural health. She lives in Northeast Florida with her husband of 12 years and their 5 furry children. Read Deanna’s blog A Fragile Faith.

I can’t seem to find my voice. I usually have so much to say, thoughts that must get down on paper. But I cannot think in complete sentences. Nothing seems worth saying.

A ten-day trip rejuvenated me. . . and exhausted me. I want to cocoon into my own world for a few days.

Oddly, I can. My son is at day camp. I have nothing I must do. My husband works late. No need for dinners.

Mac and cheese. Peanut butter. Popcorn.

I know. Not the best meals. But sometimes every mother just says, “Why not? What harm will it do to have popcorn for dinner?”

My email program is broken. I am running a “restore feature.” It’s been running two days. I can’t go through the normal routine of “back to work.”

It’s seems foreign to not have multiple responsibilities. With my life comes a to-do list. Days are usually about getting through, not pondering my plans. I have come to expect chaos, and it feels normal.

I wander around, I watch the news, I see what friends are doing on Facebook. It all seems pointless. I hardly looked at news or social networks for 10 days and it made. . . no. . . difference.

I feel cleansed somehow. Unable to get back into the motion of doing.

What was it like to just be?

God tells us He will “refresh the weary and satisfy the faint.” (Jeremiah 31:25). I am open to the refreshment but I have forgotten how to ask.

I curl up with my Bible. What is God’s plan for my time this week? I read. I search. I pray.

Usually I am overwhelmed with God’s voice. Instead I just hear, “Rest. . . Just rest. It’s okay. Don’t make the idea of resting one more thing to do.”

Laundry needs folding. Unpacking needs completed. I don’t care.

My body needs to rest. My soul needs to rest.

It will wait.

I can wait.

I am learning to be satisfied without the chaos.

Calmness is not just a lack of chaos. It is peace in finding the quietness.

Lisa Copen is the founder of Rest Ministries and she lives in San Diego with her husband and son. She is gradually learning how to balance motherhood, family, illness, and ministry, but she still knows it will be a lifetime lesson. You can see the books she has written, including, Why Can’t I Make People Understand? at the Rest Ministries shop.

Last fall a popular health activist organization had a video contest asking us to share our journey about being a health advocate. I didn’t win, but taking the time to share about my story of how I went from a stirring for illness ministry to where Rest Ministries is today was a winning experience!

Here I share about how I originally thought I would work for a non profit organization, but after my diagnosis of rheumatoid arthritis at the age of 24, I began my own “health promotion activities,” by starting Rest Ministries and in 2002, Invisible Illness Awareness Week. Through both of these experiences of finding my health mission, I have had the honor of working with many activist websites and organizations and the joy of working with you!

Lisa Copen

I spent yesterday at the hospital bedside of a very close friend who had a stroke that left him completely blind. We spent hours reminiscing about our many years together, and I learned a lesson which I am passing on to you.

My friend had just celebrated his 85th birthday. He was in the D-day invasion in World War II, wounded and later taken prisoner by the Germans. He has a wonderful wife and family.

As he lay there, staring sightlessly at the ceiling, he said, “So many things I’d planned that I’ll never get done.” Tears flowed as he talked (I had a few also but he couldn’t see them).

“I can never see my children and grandchildren and all the things they are doing. I can’t watch them become adults.”
“I have a million things I wanted to do and can’t do them now.”
“I won’t be able to work in my yard, plant seeds and watch things grow.”
“Sure, I can hear the birds but I can’t watch them at the bird feeder.”
“I have shelves of books I planned on reading. . .”
“No more golf,” he said, and the tears kept flowing.

“Most of all,” he continued, “I haven’t shown the ones I love as much as I should. And now I can’t see the expressions on their faces when I do. Will they still love me? Or will I be a burden on them? And what will happen to my friends I’ve known over the years? Will they stay away and be embarrassed in my presence?”

I had to remind him I was there and others would feel as I do and continue their friendship.

“Most of all, I can’t do things like repairs around the house, drive a car, meet friends for lunch, watch TV, read newspapers, walk in the neighborhood, even feed myself without help.”

Then he began sobbing and as I reached for his hand, I choked back my tears. Speaking softly but firmly, I said, “You have survived and have no paralysis. Your family and friends still love you and always will. Let’s talk about the good things that can keep you going.”

I reminded him, “Several places are available that work with the blind. I know a blind man who is a successful attorney. He was coached on how to use his special phone, as well as other daily activities he handles with little or no problems.”

Still holding his hand, I said, “You know your wife loves you. So do your children and grand-kids. They’ve shown that love already. They are anxious to help build your future and will work with you in making your life a thousand times better than you expect it to be.

“Now here’s advice from me, your long time friend. Work with your family. Thank them for every goal they helped you achieve. But most important–and I can’t emphasize it enough–take that recording equipment I know you have. Turn it on and start with your birth and tell about yourself. Talk into the microphone about all you remember as a little kid, your first school days, your childhood adventures, all of your later schooling.

After telling your college experiences, talk about your courtship with your wife, when your children were born, your first job and subsequent career until retirement. I know you’ve been successful; tell how you achieved that success. Pull out memories – good and bad – from your past. Share them all. Talk about your war ordeals and the years you spent as a prisoner of war. You have so many great memories to share.”

He seemed to brighten up at my suggestions and said, “That’s a good idea. I’ll do it.”

He is going home today from the hospital. One daughter and husband are moving into their large home with him and his wife. I am convinced he will have the best of care.

Why am I giving this story to you, my readers? My point is this: You, too, should get a tape recorder and dictate your life story. Or if you feel capable, write it; however, most of us can talk about our past rather than dictating it. Relive and cherish those memories.

I had a brother, now deceased, who joined the Marines in the mid-30′s. He was on Corregidor which the Japanese finally captured after six weeks. He survived the hell of the Death March plus 44 months as a POW. During his final years we convinced him to tell his experiences on his son’s recorder. We listen to his story and laugh and cry. All of us are thankful for those recorded unforgettable memories.

Let’s profit from my friend and my brother. My strong request is for you to record in some way your life experiences before it’s too late! It’s something both you and your loved ones will never regret.

We challenge you to do this this summer! You may look around you and see only the things which you are unable to do. But you have many of God’s teachings and revelations inside you from the suffering you have endured.

So record it. Tell it. Share it. Share about your life. Your favorite memories, of even the not-so-favorite ones that were still instrumental in creating the mosaic you are you today. Ideas? Suggestions? We’d love to hear them.

Denton Harris was in World War Two in the 86th Infantry Division. He attended college in Missouri and relocated to Atlanta, where he married a wonderful lady married in l948 (and is still married!). He has done investments, founded several businesses, including a bank where he was chairman. Currently, Denton us doing personal investments and writing. He has been the director of the largest Sunday School department in his church for over 35 years.

In coming months I will be sharing more of your testimonies about your involvement in small groups, the Sunroom, on Facebook, daily devotionals–wherever Rest Ministries has touched your life. Print, audio, or videos are all welcome if you’re interested in sharing. Lisa

From a woman we will call Samantha, who has been a part of a HopeKeepers in Southern California that has met for over 10 years.

I was a young Christian woman, just starting my career, newly in love, and full of hopes for the future.

Then, one day, chronic pain entered my life and set up a long-term stay. Now, over 20 years later, I live in constant severe pain.

Do I have many moments of questioning, tears and frustration? If I said I didn’t, I’d be giving false testimony, and worse, making it harder for someone who is reading this to believe that there is such a thing as solid hope even when one is living through intense suffering.

No, I haven’t found an answer, medically, for my chronic pain, but I found these things, which are so valuable. . . a God who suffers alongside me and does not turn His back on me, a group called–of all things–HopeKeepers (R).

The group has co-suffering servant-hearted leaders who are incredibly accepting and inspire me to spiritual maturity, brave fellow seekers and believers who listen and care and pray and allow me–in my brokenness–to listen to, care, and pray for them in return.

I am now still a young Christian woman, still growing in love with the same devoted man, striving to understand the riches of God’s Word, still leaning hard into my Savior.

What have I learned through HopeKeepers? Simple–No one gets through life without pain. The blessed ones are not those who live without heartache, obstacles and pain, but the ones who, in pain, in struggle, have love, hope and support in their very soul because of the giver of hope.

I invite others with whom I cross paths who are suffering to join us in community as we endeavor to keep our hope, right where it needs to be–in Christ.

Are you interested in starting a HopeKeepers group?

HopeKeepers is the small group program of Rest Ministries that meets in churches and communities around the world. Rest Ministries provides help in starting your group, materials and resources, tools such as training DVD to help increase awareness of (mostly invisible) illness in your church, and opportunities for networking with other leaders.

To find out more visit the “Start a Group” section of our web site.

Related articles

• When Our Church Disappoints Us, Where Do We Put Those Emotions (chronicillnesspaindevotionals.wordpress.com)
• The Journey of Life Is Not Meant to Be Done Alone (chronicillnesspaindevotionals.wordpress.com)

By Bridget Gazlay

According to Gallup’s daily poll of 1500 Americans, 54% felt our economic outlook is getting worse (February 2, 2011). There is no doubt about it; these days are hard. And being that I am a young single person it’s even tougher – especially since I am also chronically ill.

My life has many ups and many downs, but my life is never dull, that’s for sure. I am also an Administrative Assistant, author, fabric artist, and aunt! In spite of challenging times, my life is so blessed. My hope is to share my heart and blessings with you over the coming months.

My biggest goal is that from my adventures, you would be encouraged to follow your dreams no matter what obstacles come your way. These first few columns will give you an introduction of who I am and how I got to be a 35 year-old author and artist.

I am able to work full-time and in light of Michigan’s job market, I feel so lucky to have a great job. There was a point in my life when I thought I would not be able to provide for myself. At the age of 19, I was diagnosed with Fibromyalgia, a chronic illness affecting the nerves and muscles. More is coming out about that these days, but some symptoms include intense muscle pain, chronic fatigue, and headaches.

At that point, I was having trouble getting my college work completed, and having been an A-student, I found this very trying. With lots of prayer and family support, I did graduate from college with honors. To me, that was miracle number one!

Today, I still battle chronic fatigue and pain, but I now also endure Irritable Bowel Syndrome (stomach issues), kidney stones, Endometriosis (have had three surgeries), nerve damage in my left arm and leg, and now arthritis in my hands and feet. There are days when I feel so much older than I am. But it’s during these times I often see God work the most in my life. One of my favorite life passages in the Bible is from Isaiah 40:30-31 (NIV) which says:

“Even youths grow tired and weary, and young men stumble and fall; but those who hope in the Lord will renew their strength. They will soar on wings like eagles; they will run and not grow weary, they will walk and not be faint.”

I never thought I would be able to work full-time, let alone be an author or artist, but here I am today and I am so amazed! I would not trade my life for anyone else’s as I have learned so much and gained so much – some of which you will hear about in this column.

May you leave with Hope for Today!

Bridget Gazlay resides in the beautiful West Michigan. She struggles with Fibromyalgia, Endometriosis, IBS, arthritis and migraines. She works full time but writes and designs fabric cards as she is able. Bridget’s prayer is for readers who come across her writing or fabric cards to see that she allows, “God’s creation to be my inspiration.” You can reach Bridget at: quiltforhim@yahoo.com or www.pfccreations.com. Make sure to check out her new blog: www.pfccreations.com/blog.