I began this in 2002 and it’s reached out to hundreds of thousands of people over the years, encouraging them that they are not alone.

This year we will not be having a “live show.” I made this decision earlier in the year for many reasons, and have been glad I listened to the Lord’s instruction. August I was sick most of the month from an allergic reaction to a medication.

The day after my son returned to school, for the first time in 15 years my computer had it’s hard drive go bad. (On an 18-month old computer!) It was at the shop a  week and just I it was returned last week I started installing programs when San Diego had their record-breaking electrical outage. No power, plus school cancelled the next day.

So I sit here the evening before, watching shows on 9/11 and wondering where Invisible Illness Week fits into it all. Perhaps the same message I have always tried to tell people who are hurting– 

You are not alone.

Someone cares.

God cares.

Yes, life is hard. The world is full of suffering. . .

But God cares, and He is listening. Just talk to Him. Just talk.

Bless you,
Lisa

Many of you are familiar with Cecil Murphy, if not from one of his 100+ books, then from the lovely book, “90 Minutes in Heaven” (which we carry at Rest Ministries bookstore!)

Twila says, “We’ll have a bit of fun and give you the opportunity to learn the inside scoop on Cec. And we’ll dialogue about a different topic each weeksometimes tough topics.”

In light of so much recent news in the media about lawsuits surrounding the issue of sexual abuse, and because Cec is a survivor and has written When a Man You Love Was Abused: A Woman’s Guide to Helping Him Overcome Childhood Sexual Molestation , we’ll discuss that topic during our first show. If you listen to the live streaming, call in with questions and comments at 877-864-4869. We’ll also give away a few books. If you’re unable to listen live, you’ll be able to download the shows from the Toginet website.

On Wednesday, October 6, 11 am-noon CST, Cec will do a free one-hour webinar for Kyria on identifying and overcoming abuse. He will discuss his own experience with childhood physical, verbal, and sexual abuse and how it affected his relationships and his faith into adulthood. He will also help church leaders, family members, and friends know symptoms to look for in someone they think may be abused, as well as appropriate ways to help in the healing process.

October is National Breast Cancer Awareness Month. Cec knows what it means to walk the journey of cancer with someone he loves, and he’s written a beautiful, practical gift book called When Someone You Love Has Cancer: Comfort and Encouragement for Caregivers and Loved Ones . If someone you love has cancer, or if you know of a caregiver who needs a bit of comfort, this book with Cec’s spirit-lifting thoughts makes a nice gift.

Joel and Lisa, 1996

“I’m not going to kiss you…”

Who would ever think that hearing these words from your spouse would be considered a sign of his deep love? As my husband and I celebrated our 14th anniversary recently at a nice hotel on the Oregon Coast, we walked on the beach hand in hand, and finally, after 3 days I said, “Just kiss me!” so he did.

He’d been in the state of “getting sick” for the last week on and off. The 1000-mile drive (and all the caffeine I kept handing him on the way to stay awake) had not exactly helped him fight it off.

Yep, that kiss was really stepping out of a safety zone. I’m glad to say I didn’t get sick.

Some of you may laugh. If you don’t have a chronic illness, you may think this all sounds a bit odd. I mean, who is going to get sick from one quick little kiss, right?

Well. . . me. And maybe you too, if you have a less than effective immune system.

Some of us may remember when we were young and in love and if the one we cared about was sick we just said “Ah, kiss me anyway.”

If we didn’t yet have a chronic illness our immune system could fight off the few germs from a kiss. And if we actually got sick? Well, that was just romantic, right?

About 6 weeks after I was officially diagnosed with rheumatoid arthritis in 1993, my husband (who was just a boyfriend at the time) got the chicken pox. Despite our best of efforts for me to avoid it, I remember being at work and getting a horribly sore throat in a matter of an hour. I went home, and soon the sores started to appear on the rest of my body.

Although we’d been in our twenties, neither one of us had ever had the chicken pox. I remember him coming over to my home (where I rented a room) and we sat on the couch for hours watching movies. It wan’t fun, but I had been able to get on medications quickly to avoid the worst of the pox. He wasn’t so lucky. He had an allergic reaction and was quite miserable.

But there was a certain amount of “we’re in this together” feeling. As the saying goes, “shared hardship creates intimacy.” And yes, sharing chicken pox did create relationship memories. We thought we’d have stories to tell our child someday when he got them. Instead, he just got a vaccinne.

Now we aren’t so “romantic.” There are better ways to creat memories in a relationship and we have enough “shared hardships” that happen naturally without allowing new ones to happen, like shared colds.

Is a rushed kiss worth me being sick for weeks or maybe months? Nope! Is it worth me having to go off of my immuno-suppressant medications? The risk of possible upper respiratory infection? Uh, no.It turns not only my health upside down, but our entire household.

Can all of this hurt a relationship? Yes, it can if you let it. When it comes to intimacy within a marriage where chronic illness exists it takes a great deal of communication, a sense of humor, and . . . love.

Because when my husband stood there in front of friends and family and pledged to love me in sickness and in health in 1996, he knew the odds were that there would be a lot more sickness than health. He knew the difference between having an illness and “being sick.” He didn’t know all that would happen, but he promised to be there beside me. . . and he has been.

You know you have a chronic illness within your marriage, when your spouse puts on surgical gloves before caring for your wound and you aren’t even slightly humiliated. Or when you MUST get along (even when you are both stressed and driving each other nuts) because he is the only one in the house who can run the computer that is attached to your IV that gives you your doses of medication.

I realize how blessed I am to have a loving husband who stands beside me (some days to prop me up). He’s not perfect, and neither am I, but together, we are learning to walk the path of both marriage and illness together. And most days I do get a kiss!

To hear more from Rest Ministries founder, Lisa Copen and her husband Joel, listen to the podcast they did together on marriage and illness for National Invisible Chronic Illness Awareness Week 2009.

Joel & Lisa, 4/13/1996

“I’m not going to kiss you.”

Who would ever think that hearing these words from your spouse would be considered a sign of his deep love? As my husb& & I celebrated our 14th anniversary recently at a nice hotel on the Oregon Coast, we walked on the beach h& in h&, & finally, after 3 days I said, “Just kiss me!” so he did.

He’d been in the state of “getting sick” for the last week on & off. The 1000-mile drive (& all the caffeine I kept h&ing him on the way to stay awake) had not exactly helped him fight it off.

Yep, that kiss was really stepping out of a safety zone. I’m glad to say I didn’t get sick.

Some of you may laugh. If you don’t have a chronic illness, you may think this all sounds a bit odd. I mean, who is going to get sick from one quick little kiss, right?

Well. . . me. And maybe you too, if you have a less than effective immune system.

Some of us may remember when we were young & in love & if the one we cared about was sick we just said “Ah, kiss me anyway.”

If we didn’t yet have a chronic illness our immune system could fight off the few germs from a kiss. And if we actually got sick? Well, that was just romantic, right?

About 6 weeks after I was officially diagnosed with rheumatoid arthritis in 1993, my husb& (who was just a boyfriend at the time) got the chicken pox. Despite our best of efforts for me to avoid it, I remember being at work & getting a horribly sore throat in a matter of an hour. I went home, & soon the sores started to appear on the rest of my body.

Although we’d been in our twenties, neither one of us had ever had the chicken pox. I remember him coming over to my home (where I rented a room) & we sat on the couch for hours watching movies. It wan’t fun, but I had been able to get on medications quickly to avoid the worst of the pox. He wasn’t so lucky. He had an allergic reaction & was quite miserable.

But there was a certain amount of “we’re in this together” feeling. As the saying goes, “shared hardship creates intimacy.” And yes, sharing chicken pox did create relationship memories. We thought we’d have stories to tell our child someday when he got them. Instead, he just got a vaccinne.

Now we aren’t so “romantic.” There are better ways to creat memories in a relationship & we have enough “shared hardships” that happen naturally without allowing new ones to happen, like shared colds.

Is a rushed kiss worth me being sick for weeks or maybe months? Nope! Is it worth me having to go off of my immuno-suppressant medications? The risk of possible upper respiratory infection? Uh, no.It turns not only my health upside down, but our entire household.

Can all of this hurt a relationship? Yes, it can if you let it. When it comes to intimacy within a marriage where chronic illness exists it takes a great deal of communication, a sense of humor, & . . . love.

Because when my husb& stood there in front of friends & family & pledged to love me in sickness & in health in 1996, he knew the odds were that there would be a lot more sickness than health. He knew the difference between having an illness & “being sick.” He didn’t know all that would happen, but he promised to be there beside me. . . & he has been.

You know you have a chronic illness within your marriage, when your spouse puts on surgical gloves before caring for your wound & you aren’t even slightly humiliated. Or when you MUST get along (even when you are both stressed & driving each other nuts) because he is the only one in the house who can run the computer that is attached to your IV that gives you your doses of medication.

I realize how blessed I am to have a loving husb& who st&s beside me (some days to prop me up). He’s not perfect, & neither am I, but together, we are learning to walk the path of both marriage & illness together. And most days I do get a kiss!

To hear more from Rest Ministries founder, Lisa Copen & her husb& Joel, listen to the podcast they did together on marriage & illness for National Invisible Chronic Illness Awareness Week 2009.

Presentations from the national summit, “Companions on the Road to Recovery from Mental Illness: Pathways for the 21st Century,” are now available on-line as free downloads. (This is a pdf)

It was held in October of 2009 in St. Louis, MO. The conference agenda is posted on pathways2promise.org with embedded links to some 20 of the presentations from the conference.

Reprinted with permission by Rev. Susan Gregg-Schroeder, Coordinator of Mental Health Ministries

Last year  I read this Christian counselor’s book 12 Ways to Turn Your Pain into Praise: Biblical Steps to Wholeness in Christ & was very blessed by it. She has written for HopeKeepers Magazine & was a guest on my radio podcast, Hope Endures. I know she has blessed many of you with that interview.

If you have not had the opportunity to hear our interview yet, I thought you may be interested before reading our interview on Friday. She talks about how we can find the blessings even in the pain.