“Why does God want us to be afraid of Him?” asked my sweet son recently. We were reading a scripture and it mentioned how we should fear the Lord. This is a question that most of us have asked at one time or another, and one we don’t always get a satisfactory answer. I mean, God tells us He is our Father, our Abba, our friend, our protector. . . and then on the other hand He wants us to be afraid of Him? What kind of friend does that?

When we live with a chronic illness we are up against all sorts of things that we can fear. We fear going to the doctor, we fear not going to the doctor. We fear taking the medications and dealing with side effects, we fear not taking the medications and coping with the possibly damaging results to our body. The list can go on and on. Why on earth would God want us to add Him to that list of fears?

The amplified version of the Bible says, “The secret [of the sweet, satisfying companionship] of the Lord have they who fear (revere and worship) Him, and He will show them His covenant and reveal to them its [deep, inner] meaning.”

According to Merriam Webster’s Dictionary, “revere” means to “show devoted deferential honor to: regard as worthy of great honor.” When we fear the Lord, it is meant to be because we fully comprehend He is to be given such great honor.

We are to acknowledge that this God in our lives is the same God who said ‘Let there be light” (Genesis 1:3) and there was light. . . and this light was not even the sun, which He created three days later (Genesis 1:6). God is all powerful–and loving, and yet, He also can be vengeful when the situation is appropriate for this (Romans 12:19). In Psalm 6:1 David pleads “O Lord, rebuke me not in your anger, nor discipline me in your wrath.”

To acknowledge that God is God and He has the right to rebuke or discipline, can be one of the ways we “fear God.” I believe that God wants the best for me. I can expect, should expect, that there will be consequences when I start taking Him for granted, when I let my priorities slip out of order, when I spend money foolishly, when I forget to tell Him thank you for the things He has blessed me with. As my grandma used to say, “You’re getting to big for those britches.” God has a way of drawing us back to Him, and sometimes that path is full of a lot of potholes!

I like the simple version of this scripture from The Messages. It states, “God-friendship is for God-worshipers; They are the ones He confides in.” When we worship Him, remember His glory and honor Him, we create a friendship and from that He shares some of the mysteries to help us through those difficult days. We can see how He works out our messes into miracles; though our circumstances may have been the same, we likely would not have seen His hand, if we were lacking being in communion with Him.

Prayer: Lord, fearing You is having a healthy respect, a reverance to You who created the heavens and the earth–and me! It is recalling how You never leave my side through the good times and the bad. Humble me so that I have a healthy fear of You in ways that will strengthen our relationship, not add stress to it.

About the Author:
Lisa Copen is an author, speaker, and the founder of Rest Ministries which serves the chronically ill. She lives in San Diego with her husband and 8-year-old son. She is currently writing a book for Christian moms who live with chronic illness. If you are interested in sharing your stories, feedback and confessions for the book, visit her Facebook page at http://MomWithIllness.com .

You can now read this on your Kindle. Find out more at http://TodaysDevotionOnKindle.com

When you hear that we should “fear” God, what comes to mind? How have you reconciled these verses? How do you express or see your “fear of the Lord”?

It is the second week in January. According to the world, it is time to “get busy.” But I feel like molasses is a world of energy drinks. I still have much I want to give, but it is not bubbling just below the surface like it usually does.

Despite all the hype about doing, I am just concentrating on being. Well, the word “concentrating” is over-stating the reality. Honestly, I am just wandering around, resting in not having a to-do list of items that “must be done today or else,” and yet, still feeling like I am wasting time by just resting.

There is a long list of things I should be doing for this ministry. I feel my presence has not been what protocol dictates. Yet, I don’t like to fake it. I want to be real with you. I want to be authentic. And who says I all of these ideas should turn into more “should”–really? What shoulds have you put upon yourself and then felt the stress because you didn’t do it?

I am too depleted to give of myself, so I have just been hibernating for awhile. And waiting. Sometimes the waiting may come across to you as me being unorganized, uncaring, distracted. But it is just self-preservation. It is getting rid of the noise in my life, so if God speaks –I can hear Him.

Most ministries have many employees. While the founder takes a needed sabbatical, the program leaders start up a new Bible study. While the founder stays home to get over a cold, the web designer updates the site to reflect the new year. I am very blessed to have volunteers that help us in so many ways, and yet, I still feel as though I am dropping the ball. I am here. but, right now, I don’t have anything I can give.

There is much God wants to do with Rest Ministries. There is also much I want to do. But I need some time to determine what He wants to build–without my plans getting in the way.

I am soaking, marinating, spending time regrouping. I am not depressed. Discouraged perhaps, because I have stuff I want to do but no energy. I am discouraged because I know that the new year often feels this way to me and yet, for some reason, I am still surprised when I am not a ball of fire on January 1st like the rest of the world.

For now, I am just maintaining the coals beneath the surface. The fire is still there, but it is simmering, not producing flames.

So know this. . . I have not forgotten you, my precious friends of Rest Ministries. I have faith that you understand. And during times like this it is always amazing for me to sit back and watch you minister to each other in ways that I cannot even imagine. Out of your own pain comes so much unbelievable joy. And I know that there is no possible way joy can come from pain unless you are rooted in God’s loving hand.

These are the times that humble me. I am reminded that this ministry is not about me or what I can do. It is God’s ministry and I am leaving it in His hands as I rest.

Lisa Copen

One of the first times I had a table at a health conference to exhibit to encourage attendance they had bus transportation for many women from an assisted living center. There were over 50 booths and many women walked around with their canes or zoomed around on their carts.

As they would come to my table, I would explain to each of them about Rest Ministries and they’d say, “Now, sweetie, I think this is just lovely.” They’d take a brochure and walk on. About thirty minutes later they would come back by again and say, “Oh, now what do we have here?”

Some of them were still holding the brochure, but they were just positive they’d not seen my table yet or spoken to me. I just smiled and gave my spiel again. Some must have circled around five times.

Our memory is so fragile! It depends on our physical health, our mental health, our age, medications we are taking or not taking, stress, distractions, even our diet. So many things!

Thank goodness God’s memory never fails. God can choose to have no memory, such as . But God never accidentally forgets something–an event, a promise, His children–you and I.

I think God loves it when we cry out to Him that we need Him. When we say, “Lord, remember me. I am hurting. I am in so much pain. I am sick of being sick. I am tired of being grumpy. I don’t know how I am going to pay for all these bills. Remember me, Lord. Remember me. . .”

Prayer: Lord, remember me. Please remember me. Remember the me that was–before the illness took a hold of this body–because my personality is still here and others do not see it. Remember me, and help me remember that which you desire me to recall and not worry about the rest.

About the Author:
Lisa Copen is an author, speaker, and the founder of Rest Ministries which serves the chronically ill. She lives in San Diego with her husband and 8-year-old son. Are you a mom with an illness? Be sure to visit http://momwithillness.com to help Lisa work on her new book (she can use your help!)

You can now read this on your Kindle. Find out more at http://TodaysDevotionOnKindle.com

When you think of what you would like God to “remember” on your behalf, what kinds of things would you list?

When I was diagnosed with rheumatoid arthritis I was just 24 years old and when I began Rest Ministries I was 26. I could not easily find young adults who lived with chronic illness each day, but I also was unable to find a ministry that was specifically for those with chronic illness.

Wow, how the Internet has changed so many things! Now the idea of an “invisible illness” is not something unusual to hear of, but a popular “keyword” in search engines. The theology that those of us with illness are not always healed, but sometimes called to suffer for Christ can be found in thousands and thousands of blogs. It is so encouraging to see so many young women and men who are expressing their love of Jesus as well as their difficult sufferings. They hurt. . . and love God anyway! When Rest Ministries first went online in 1996 it was nearly impossible to find websites that spoke of God’s mercy within our pain.

In fact, I was berated by many who told me I was not doing the Lord’s work since I didn’t tell people that everyone could be healed. Well, everyone can be healed. Not everyone is healed on this side of heaven. I learned when to step away from the computer without shedding tears over mean remarks. I knew God knew.

Somehow, I felt God leading me to begin this ministry, even though I had so many flaws.

If you consider yourself young (and it’s all a matter of attitude, right?), allow me to encourage you that when people ask you, “And how old are you exactly?” Don’t be discouraged! Your experiences in the school of suffering have caused you to have many sleepless nights, but also wisdom way beyond the years of one who has not suffered. God feels that you (yes, you!) can set an example in faith. . . in love . . .in your speech and purity–your life!

Did you know that wisdom does not actually come with age? It is not automatically a part of our birthday gift each year. It comes with the willingness to look at that which you have endured and listen to how God is using it to speak to you–and at times, speak through you

Your illness may and likely will cause you many painful moments when you feel isolated, alone, even defeated. However, always remember, you have a gift! Do not ever allow your gift to sit idle because you feel you are too young or ill-equipped to represent the Lord well. Like it or not, you have been chosen to have this gift. God will equip you with whatever it is you need to use your gift. Now it’s is up to you to decide what to do with it.

Prayer: Lord, remind me that my pain and suffering does have a purpose and that it is a gift. I can choose to hide this gift or share it with others. Regardless of my age, give me the assurance that I am humbly in the middle of Your will, even when I feel in over my head, as it’s not about me and my abilities, Lord, but about You.

About the Author:
Lisa Copen is an author, speaker, and the founder of Rest Ministries which serves the chronically ill. She lives in San Diego with her husband and 8-year-old son. She is currently writing a book for Christian moms who live with chronic illness. If you are interested in sharing your stories, feedback and confessions for the book, visit her Facebook page at http://MomWithIllness.com .

As I am learning more about ADHD, a diagnosis my son received earlier this year, I am beginning to see why he reacts the way he does to certain situations. One noticeable response is when something is different than his typical routine he emotionally freezes up. I recently heard a a wonderful explanation of why it may be hard for him to see another option as being viable, despite our best attempt to present him with multiple choices.

For example, if you always drive to the grocery store a certain route, and one day there is construction, the average person may instinctively just drive around the block looking for another entrance or follow the detour signs. One with ADHD, however, cannot even see that these other options exist. They put their brakes on, refuse to move, and start to feel anxiety, maybe even having a type of panic attack.

Observers may see this behavior as stubbornness or strong-will. They present other options, but they are all turned down. Until the person can come to a reconciliation in his own mind that another option exists, and he is willing to take the risk of trying it, they are at a standstill. Stuck.

As I read this, I wondered how many adults are coping with this hurdle and spiritually beating themselves up because they know this scripture about not being anxious, but even the simplest changes in their daily routine leave them floundering.

Yes, God does tell us to be “anxious is nothing . Oh, how much harder this is to practice then it sounds! While some of us may have a medical condition that makes it exceptionally hard for us to avoid anxiety, others of us can still struggle with it in our every day life. The fears of the unknown, the costs involved, and even the uncomfortable medical procedures all are reasonable excuses for being anxious, but that doesn’t mean we can give into that natural instinct.

But feeling anxiety is not a reason to think, “I am such a terrible Christian. I should be better at this.” Don’t allow yourself to feel guilt and shame, bringing the focus back onto yourself. Instead, cling to God’s promises and put the emphasis on His ability to cast aside fear.

“I sought the Lord, and He answered me; He delivered me from all my fears.” (Psalm 34:4)
“Do not be afraid of those who kill the body but cannot kill the soul.” (Matthew 10:28a)
“Jesus told him, ‘Don’t be afraid; just believe.’” (Mark 5:36b)

Prayer: God, sometimes no matter how hard I try to hear your voice clearly, I just see roadblocks everywhere. Teach me to clearly see my options and teach me not to fear alternatives to my typical routine by casting out any fear that is not from you.

Lisa Copen is the founder of Rest Ministries and she lives in San Diego with her husband and son. She is gradually learning how to balance motherhood, family, illness, and ministry, but she still knows it will be a lifetime lesson. You can see the books she has written, including, Why Can’t I Make People Understand? at the Rest Ministries shop.

You can now read this on your Kindle. Find out more at http://TodaysDevotionOnKindle.com

Does a small change in your routine throw off your stress level? When other people tell you that you have plenty of alternative options do you tend to not be able to see them as real choices? How do you get past the anxiety so you are able to make a decision?

To be honest, I have never met Jenni in person. We both began our ministries around 1997 and met online. She had a ministry for those with infertility. I had a ministry for those with chronic illness. But she also had a chronic illness and I also was dealing with infertility. We both juggled illnesses and ministries and families and searched for God’s will for our lives. And through the years we also learned to navigate the internet, the changes in it, how we were able to reach out people to share God’s love.

At the end of 2002 she told me that she was expecting her third child and had not wanted to tell me since my husband and I had been waiting to adopt two years at that point. I told her not to worry, I was thrilled for her. And then January 8th we got “the call.” We had been chosen by a birth mom and the baby was due January 26th. Jenni’s baby was due January 25th. They were both born as expected and we’ve grown up sharing our stories about them online.

We’ve also shared our challenges in being a mom when chronically ill–though Jenni, with three children she also homeschools, always was my inspiration! As I was formulating my ideas for writing a book for Christian moms with chronic illness, Jenni emailed me and said, “I told my mom that someone needs to write a book for moms with illness and it’s not me!”

Jenni is one of my biggest supporters. We rally for one another when we want testimonials for our ministries or our books. I rejoiced with her when her book, Hannah’s Hope: Seeking God’s Heart in the Midst of Infertility, Miscarriage, and Adoption Loss was published by NavPress in 2005. She has participated in my podcasts and we have written for each others web sites.

She has a web site many of you have visited at Harvesting Hope from Heartache™ and has been working on her next book about the apostle Paul and suffering. She is always busy and I have no idea how she juggles it all and also makes each person feel special and heard.

On October 25th her husband posted this:

Today at about 10:30 Jenni has a seizure after getting a chiropractic treatment. She was brought to the Renown Downtown Hospital, via ambulance, She has been unresponsive, and has had a CT scan, EKG, spinal tap and an MRI. She is now being moved to the ICU, and we will need to wait and see. She has a slew of doctors, all not sure of what she has, so please please pray.

Next day. . .

After over 6 hours of no response, Jenni tried to open her eyes, even a little, squeezed my hand, and was able to shake her head yes and no to a few basic questions.

October 26th

It appears that she has had a few small strokes, but the neurologist is hopeful that she will ultimately recover from the issues that it will cause. She was able to get her neck brace off, and we hope her intubation tube will soon follow. She is breathing on her own, and has even given hugs to a few visitors. Also pray, as she will lose her drivers license for 6 months minimum. Thanks for all your prayers, emails and calls!

October 27

We have been informed that Jenni did in fact have a stroke on Tuesday, which manifested itself visibly in her having the seizure. She was able to have the intubation tube and nasal gastric tube removed today (a blessing). She is dealing with double vision, a drooping face and difficulty speaking, and is in ICU for the next few days, when we hope to move her to a normal room.

We will see what other effects it has on her in the coming days. It is our hope that God will be gracious and heal her completely, but know that we are most likely looking at it taking a long time to get back to 100%. Please pray for Jenni to be healed completely, and for her to be held up both emotionally and mentally until that time. If you have an free time to pray, please pray for all the family members who are taking turns caring for her, that we will not get sick and not grow tired!

You can read more on Rick Saake’s Facebook page (You can “subscribe” to his updates without ‘befriending’ him) At this time Jenni is now in a rehabilitation hospital, likely for a few weeks. She suffered another stroke or a series of small strokes and Rick wrote on November 9th:

Jenni did well in her therapies yesterday. It is good to know she will be coming home in a few weeks if this continues, but sad to know that she will not be the wife/mother we have always known. Doctors have advised me again and again that she will never be the same, and will most likely always need assistance. I am glad though that many of the things about Jenni that the kids and I love are starting to shine through. It’s just sad to know that her life, which was getting better, now seems to be doing worse, due to a chiropractor not warning her or treating her correctly. Continue to pray for Jenni’s therapies, and pray for me get over my anger towards the chiropractor.

My heart and prayers go out to the entire family. I believe Jenni’s parents are helping with her children, Rick is trying to work part of the days, and Jenni is taking one day at a time. But as many of you know, it is very hard. And this is where we can come in. . .

Yesterday Rick wrote,

Today was a tough day for Jenni. She awoke at just over 6 am and started the day crying for almost a half hour before she called me. She is highly depressed, and feels like she is “weighing everyone down” and can’t believe that anyone is sticking with her through this, much less me. We talked on the phone for almost a half hour, and I got her calm enough to spend the morning in therapy. She found out that her left eye is doing worse than expected, and that she has a long way to go to get even partial vision back (currently everything is double and blurry).

This of course brings on even more doubt/depression. If Jenni has ever touched your life, and you have a chance in the next day, please send Jenni a card or even a short note (unless you already have). Send to Jenni Saake, 581 Secretariat Ct. Reno, NV 89521. I think she needs to hear from people other than me, that we are going to stick with her, no mater what, because that is what we do, when we love someone. Thanks for reading this – Rick

Every one of you is so special and when I post blogs like this asking you to remember someone in your prayers and maybe even a note, it can seem as though I am choosing not to do this for each of you. That is not my intent in the least. Jenni would never want “attention” called to her, especially if someone else was not comforted who needs it so. However, she is a friend to not only me, but to thousands of people online and I know many of you would want to know about her situation. She has been very open about her struggles with depression at times, in hopes of encouraging others.

If you can, please take a moment to drop a card in the mail for her. . . and one other person who you know is having a difficult time right now. As the holidays come, many people will be without friends or family, won’t be able to afford that big turkey dinner, and who could use a little note that says, “Hey, I am thinking of you. I care. I have prayed for you today.” In honor of Jenni, remember those with chronic illnesses, or those overwhelmed  moms you may know (especially those who homeschool), and those who grieve as they are dealing with infertility.

Thanks, friends.

Lisa Copen
Rest Ministries director

PS: If you would like to add your comments below for Jenni, I will make sure she sees them. I don’t have any further information about her diagnosis, treatment, etc. so if I don’t respond to your questions, it’s because I don’t have those answers.

PPS: Note: Please be aware of the risks involved in chiropractic care, as with any kind of medical treatment. Chiropractic Stroke Awareness Group, LLC has additional information to be aware of when considering benefits and risks.