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Q&A: How Can I Let People Know Their Perfume is Making Me Sick?

January 5, 2012 By 7 Comments
fragrance

I have Multiple Chemical Sensitivities and when people who are wearing perfume want to hug me they transfer their scent to my clothing! How can we let people know that their perfume is having the opposite intended effect on some people? That to someone with MCS, their perfume is about 20 times more intense and nauseating! I'm not comfortable saying, "Hi there! No offense, but your perfume makes me gag! No, I can't sit next to you!" If I were king, I'd lump perfume with cigarette smoke and ban it in public places! Sorry you perfume lovers-- nothing personal. I am just trying to breathe and be healthy. --Semi-silent sufferer, attending church on-line Dear Semi-silent sufferer, You are definitely not alone! Although many assume this … [Read more...]

Filed Under: Church Leader, Coping Skills, Help! Q/A, Invisible Illnesses, Links, Person w/ Illness Tagged With: , , , , , , ,

Q & A: If I Go to this Holiday Party, Should I Explain About My Chronic Pain?

November 29, 2011 By 4 Comments
party

My best friend is having a holiday party and I would really like to go. On the other hand, I am kind of dreading it. All those people dressed up to the nines, carefree, without any problems in their lives. My daily pain, food allergies, broken down feet, all make a simple party rather dreary. I always feel like I need to explain why I am not real social. My friend says just to come and not worry about it, but I am not sure. Should I go? I understand it is not an easy decision to make. There are benefits to getting out and meeting new people, even when we don't feel all that great. But that doesn't mean we should sit around at the party and explain to people how hard it is to have some fun. Would we want to make the effort to have a night … [Read more...]

Filed Under: Articles, Explaining Illness, Help! Q/A, Loneliness, Person w/ Illness, What's New?

Q & A: I Don’t Seem To Fit In To Online Support Groups!

June 13, 2011 By 9 Comments
annoyed-woman

Sometimes I feel very left out in the online support groups. I live with an incredible amount of daily pain and I just need someone who cares. It seems like everyone else in the group have people who support them and write them back. But when I share something from my heart all I get is a bunch of well-meaning advice. I don't need advice! Or . . . no one responds at all. What I need is someone who will listen and try to understand. -Sandy Hi, Sandy, I can hear the pain in your words. I am going to assume since you wrote to me you are asking for some kind of advice, so here is my best 2-cents. Ask yourself, "What would the perfect response to my post be?" When we say we want people to "listen" and yet we are typing our posts out … [Read more...]

Filed Under: Explaining Illness, Help! Q/A, Hurt Feelings, Person w/ Illness, Sunroom, Support Group Leader, What's New? Tagged With: , , , , , , ,

Q&A: What Do I Do About My Friend Who Keeps Bringing Me Down?

May 19, 2011 By 2 Comments
woman-sad-09

I have a friend who I've known for years.  We used to go out partying before my diagnosis, but now I've really become grounded in my faith, because God is the only thing that has gotten me through. She keeps saying she "knows the real me" and I cannot possibly be satisfied with this life I have now.  Whenever I share something I've learned while living with illness or about anything good in my life, she has something negative to say about how much I am missing out on in life because of my illness. I care about her, but I just don't know if I can continue to be around her right now if she keeps this up. - Kelly Hi, Kelly, Do you know someone who is the same now as they were 30 or even 40 years ago? They love to complain and stir up … [Read more...]

Filed Under: Explaining Illness, Friend Has Illness, Help! Q/A, Person w/ Illness, Teen w/ Illness, What's New? Tagged With: , , , , , , , ,

Q & A: How Do I Know if God Has Motherhood In My Future?

April 20, 2011 By 4 Comments
baby-shoes

I have been married for four years and have multiple sclerosis. My husband and I have been trying to conceive for some time and it's not happening. I think I am capable of being a mom, despite my illness, but it's making me nervous to see the clock ticking--and for those of us with illness, it ticks a whole lot faster! I don't want to grow bitter about not getting pregnant yet, but my friends are having kids, doing family events, and now, not only do I feel ousted because my illness slows me down, but I am just not at soccer games and Chuck E. Cheese. How do I cope with all these mixed up feelings? Leslie Leslie, My heart aches for you. I remember my own similar journey for years back in the late nineties until the day our son was … [Read more...]

Filed Under: Adoption, Depression, Fear, Founder's Blog, Help! Q/A, Parenting, Spiritually Struggling, What's New? Tagged With: , , , , , , , , , , , ,

I Need To Forgive… But Where Do I Even Begin?

March 23, 2011 By 1 Comment
weed

I have read in some places online that many people who have a chronic illness were abused in their childhood. I know many were not, but I am one of the ones who was. I will never know for sure if the illness I have was "caused" by the stress of me trying to cope with my history, or the bitterness it caused in my heart eating away (literally!) at my body, but I know I need to figure out a way to let go of the bitterness. My father is no longer on this earth and my mom and I have a very weak relationship. I am not sure I want more. But where do I go from here?" Belinda, who doesn't want to be "Bitter Belinda" Belinda, It's true that studies have shown that sometimes chronic illness can be more prevalent among adults who suffered abuse … [Read more...]

Filed Under: Articles, Fear, Help! Q/A, Hurt Feelings, Relationships, What's New? Tagged With: , , , , , , ,
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