Person w/ lll Spouse Archives - Rest Ministries - Chronic Illness and Pain Support

Chronic Illness and Marriage: Thoughts From an Ill Husband

February 13, 2013 By admin 5 Comments

AN ILL HUSBAND SHARES HIS THOUGHTS ON MARRIAGE and what has gotten him and his wife through those tough times. Nice to see the perspective from a man who lives with illness. #chronic #illness #marriage

Most of the articles you see online show what marriage is like from the perspective of an ill wife. Karlton Douglas, our devotional writer, would like to share with you what he believes has helped his marriage survive. I thought it was a nice change to have the perspective of an ill husband too. May it bless you, Lisa "The man said, 'This is now bone of my bones and flesh of my flesh; she shall be called "woman," for she was taken out of man.' That is why a man leaves his father and mother and is united to his wife, and they become one flesh." (Genesis 1:23-24) Marriage takes a lot of work. It requires compromise, not always getting your way, sacrifice, and putting the needs of others before yourself. A successful marriage is one … [Read more...]

Filed Under: Articles, Articles - Read, Marriage, Person w/ Illness, Person w/ lll Spouse, What's New?

Romantic Ideas for A Chronically Ill Woman to Romance Her Husband

February 11, 2013 By admin 3 Comments

ROMANTIC IDEAS FOR A CHRONICALLY ILL WOMEN TO ROMANCE HER HUSBAND - when "hot and bothered" has a whole new meaning of hot flashes and annoyance you know it's time to start adding a bit of romance into your life--even if you DON'T feel like it -- you will be glad you did. #chronic illness #romance

This article is for the ladies and here is one for the men if you have an ill wife "Hot and bothered!" For most people these words create images of being twisted up in sheets, breathlessly reaching out to the one you love. For those with chronic illness, however, "hot" is more likely to refer to one's thyroid condition, night sweats, or a heating pad on high. "Bothered. . ." Well, let's just say when your body aches, everything makes you feel bothered: a cat that won't move off your leg, a joint that continues to throb, and a husband that is able to snore through minor earthquakes. It can be hard to be romantic! You may be surprised to know that nearly 1 in 2 people live with a chronic illness in the U.S.A. That means a whole lot of … [Read more...]

Filed Under: Articles, Articles - Read, Love, Marriage, Person w/ Illness, Person w/ lll Spouse, What's New?

Mobility Devices When Shopping With Your Spouse

August 2, 2012 By admin 5 Comments

Mobility isn't just a way to get around, it may also be finding someone who knows how to push you, as Michele explains with her husband as the helper. "A cheerful heart is good medicine, but a crushed spirit dries up the bones. (Proverbs 17:22) The other day my husband surprised me with a special shopping trip to my favorite store--Dollar Tree. Yes, you read correctly, a dollar store. Not just any dollar store but one that truly measures up to its name--nothing in the store is over a dollar. It did not take long before there was a damper on our special outing. As we approached the store’s door, we were immediately reminded as to why we stopped coming to this store. The sign next to the entrance of the store shows wheelchair … [Read more...]

Filed Under: Advocacy, Coping Skills, Devotionals, Marriage, Person w/ lll Spouse, What's New? Tagged With: husband pushing wheelchair, mobility

A Chronically Ill Husband: Reflections From His Wife

June 12, 2012 By admin Leave a Comment

What happens when your ill husband can no longer do or be all that he was before? Does it change your love? No, you look for God's mercies that are new every morning. I Heard a Bird Sing I heard a bird sing In the dark of December A magical thing And sweet to remember: “We are nearer to Spring Than we were in September,” I heard a bird sing In the dark of December. by Oliver Herford Winter and summer are my husband’s least favorite seasons. I have an ill husband. Although his immune system is perpetually low, he always seems to hit his lowest in the winter. I have to fight against personal dread of the winter due to this. Knowing the Father of mercies, I am always on the hunt for the new “mercy of the … [Read more...]

Filed Under: Articles, Articles - Read, Caregiver, Marriage, Person w/ lll Spouse, What's New? Tagged With: Caregiver, caregiver for spouse, Chronic, chronically ill spouse, Eeyore, husband with cancer, husband with illness, ill husband, Person w/ lll Spouse, Sunday, wife with cancer, wife with illness

God’s Surprising Timing: A Story From a Military Spouse

May 4, 2012 By admin Leave a Comment

In honor of Military Spouse Appreciation Day, today, May 4th, we offer you this inspirational article from a military wife. Thank you to all the families who serve our country daily--including the spouses and children of the men and women who are soldiers. In honor of Military Spouse Appreciation Day remember to say thank you, not just to a solider, but to his or her spouse too! Lynn Burchfield I’m currently enduring a very challenging deployment, but I want to tell you about the amazing gifts from God that have not only helped me through, but brought my family back on a path to Him. Our son was born in April 2009 and I could not imagine being any happier. Unfortunately, an upcoming deployment was looming and I couldn’t help but … [Read more...]

Filed Under: Articles, Articles - Read, Fear, Loneliness, Person w/ Illness, Person w/ lll Spouse, What's New? Tagged With: Baseguide.com, deployment, faithdeployed, miliatry spouse, Military Spouse Appreciation Day, military wives, US soldier, wife

52 Ways to Encourage a Chronically Ill Friend

May 2, 2012 By admin 5 Comments

If you are looking for ways to encourage a friend who is living with a chronic illness, dealing with a lot of pain, or even fighting cancer, this article is a great starting point to think creatively! Get the "Beyond Casseroles" book for 505 ways! By Lisa Copen Excerpt from Beyond Casseroles: 505 Ways to Encourage a Chronically Ill Friend - Please do not reprint without permission or reword a few of the ideas and post as your own article. We've seen quite a few out there and appreciate you linking back to the source here. Thanks! "A good friend is a connection to life - a tie to the past, a road to the future, the key to sanity in a totally insane world." ~Lois Wyse Ask, "What events in your life are changing and how are you … [Read more...]

Filed Under: Articles, Articles - Read, Beyond Casseroles, Books, Caregiver, Coping Skills, Explaining Illness, Founder's Blog, Friend Has Illness, Friendships, Need to Know, Overwhelmed, Person w/ Illness, Person w/ lll Spouse, Support Group Leader, What's New? Tagged With: 50 ways to encourage a chronicall ill friend, 52 ways to help an ill friend, beyond casseroles, Catherine Marshall, Christian, Chronic, God, Health, how to help a sick friend, how to help an ill friend, Illness, lisa copen, ministering to a seriously ill friend, Rest Ministries

What I’d Like to Tell The Pastor About Living with Illness

April 13, 2012 By admin 14 Comments

If you had the opportunity to sit down and really share about your pain, what would you tell the pastor of your church about your chronic illness and daily pain? Lisa Copen Living with chronic illness is lonely. Everyone around us seems to be enjoying health, happiness, and the ability to at least pursue their dreams. But many of us feel lonely, scared, and disappointed. We are faced with so many insecurities and we are living with an illness that we have not been able to pray away, cry away, or confess away. So we turn to our church for guidance, for acceptance, for unconditional support during the most difficult time in our life. But churches are made up of people—all of us imperfect. And our church does not always give us … [Read more...]

Filed Under: Articles, Articles - Read, Caregiver, Church Leader, Depression, Explaining Illness, Friend Has Illness, HopeKeepers Resources, Hurt Feelings, Loneliness, Medical Professional, Need to Know, Parent of Ill or Disabled Child, Person w/ Illness, Person w/ lll Spouse, Share Your Story, Spiritually Struggling, Support Group Leader, Teen w/ Illness, What's New? Tagged With: care pastor, Christianity, Chronic, Chronic pain, Church, church disabilities ministry, Conditions and Diseases, Congregational, congregational care, Denominations, disability ministry, Disabled, disabled ministry, disablity, God, Health, Illness, Jesus, Joni Eareckson Tada, joni erickson tada, joni tada, Lord, Online Communities, parish, parish nurse, pastor, pastoral care, pastors, Prayer, Religion and Spirituality, Rest Ministries, small groups, Stephen Ministries, stephen ministry

What To Do For Those Who Are Hurting When You Don’t Know What To Do

November 17, 2011 By admin 3 Comments

As the holidays approach more people than usual are looking for ways to reach out to help a hurting friend. Sadly, this shouldn't be a seasonal event, but something we do all year round. But most people just don't know how to do that reaching out! Well, thanks to a wonderful book we don't have that excuse any longer! One of my all-time favorite books is The Art of Helping: What to Say and Do When Someone is Hurting by Lauren Littauer Briggs. In fact, I am very honored to have a section in it for those with chronic illness. But the whole book is helpful for those of us who, well, care. And it is one of the few books I believe should be on the desk of every pastor and church secretary! So much so that when it was first published we … [Read more...]

Filed Under: Articles, Books, Caregiver, Caregiving, Church Leader, Friend Has Illness, Holidays, Medical Professional, Need to Know, Person w/ lll Spouse, Support Group Leader, What's New? Tagged With: cae-giver, Caregiver, depressed about loss of pet, Family, how to help a firend, reaching out, when a friend is hurting, when a friend is ill

In Response to Pat Robertsons Statment on Alzheimer’s and Divorce

September 16, 2011 By admin 21 Comments

I was shocked to hear such a bold statement from Mr. Pat Robertson, 700 club host, who, on Tuesday's broadcast, justified that a person should not be held accountable for leaving his spouse and seeking divorce if his spouse has been diagnosed with Alzheimer's Disease. In this scenario Mr. Robertson has shown the world that one's personal comfort, especially in the case of having a spouse with a chronic illness, is more important than the marriage vows of "for better or for worse, until death do us part." The religious broadcaster Pat Robertson and chairman of the Christian Broadcasting Network (CBN) told his "700 Club" viewers that divorcing a spouse with Alzheimer's is justifiable because the disease is "a kind of death." During … [Read more...]

Filed Under: Caregiver, Caregiving, Church Leader, Founder's Blog, Marriage, Person w/ lll Spouse, Videos, What's New? Tagged With: 700 Club, Alzheimer's disease, Christian Broadcasting Network, Joel Hunter, Joni Eareckson Tada, Pat Robertson, Rest Ministries, Terry Meeuwsen

How a Husband Can Encourage a Chronically Ill Wife – The Spiritual and Emotional Stuff

May 31, 2011 By admin Leave a Comment

Matt Horne This is part 2 of a 2 part article. Part 1 is here: Carrying Super Rachel - The Logistics of When Your Wife Is Chronically Ill It's tough to live your life with a chronic illness. Even with the best attitude and support system, you have bad days where you think futile thoughts. "I should be able to do this. . . anybody my age should!" When you can't walk yourself across the room, it's easy to become depressed. Here are some of the ways I help my wife combat this mentality: I reinforce that she's definitely worth something--in face, everything--to me. We both are an active part of our support group, the Texas Association for Dysautonomia Awareness. I encourage her to participate in things she can find joy in and … [Read more...]

Filed Under: Articles, Coping Skills, Marriage, Person w/ Illness, Person w/ lll Spouse, What's New? Tagged With: auto-immune, Caregiver, Chronic (medicine), Chronic Illness, chronic illness and marriage, Dysautonomia, Health, husband, ill, iPod, Jesus, marriage and cronic illness, marriage and crronic illness, marriage and illness, Matt Horne, Patient, Postural Orthostatic Tachycardia Syndrome, vows marriage, wife

Carrying Super Rachel – The Logistics of When Your Wife Is Chronically Ill

May 30, 2011 By admin 4 Comments

By Matt Horne Caring for a chronically ill wife is not what I had envisioned when I was working up the nerve to ask out "that hot girl" who would later become my wife. We were in college and she was on the cross country team. She let me know very early on in the relationship that she had a chronic illness. Nowadays, it's just part of life. I'm pretty sure I wouldn't know what to do with myself if she were well. There's a reason I call her "Super Rachel." On her good days, she can run circles around me--cleaning, getting things checked off her to-do list, and having tons of fun. She's amazing. On top of that, she has the greatest attitude and rarely lets her condition get her down. As her dad says, she's an "overcomer." Instead … [Read more...]

Filed Under: Articles, Cooking, Coping Skills, Love, Marriage, Organizing, Person w/ Illness, Person w/ lll Spouse, Share Your Story Tagged With: Chronic (medicine), chronically ill spouse, Dysautonomia, Exercise Physiology, Health, husband care-giver, husband caregiver, ill wife, in sickness and in health, marriage and illness, Once A Month Cooking, Person w/ lll Spouse, Postural Orthostatic Tachycardia Syndrome

We Really Need to Talk: Authors of “Sick and Tired of Feeling Sick and Tired” Have New Book on Communication

March 21, 2011 By admin Leave a Comment

By: Paul J. Donoghue, PhD and Mary E. Siegel, PhD We all need to talk to relieve tension within us and to connect with people who matter to us. But those of us who are ill really need to talk. Illness threatens our well being, evokes strong emotions, heightens our needs, and makes us more dependent on others. To cope well with all these factors we need to talk. Yet illness often leads us to isolate, to retreat into out own world of pain, fatigue, vulnerability, and fear. When we emerge from our silence, we frequently drive away those we need by blurting our thoughts formed by fear. Blame: You don't care! You don't understand! You only think of yourself. Hopeless remarks: Why don't you just leave me? I can't take it … [Read more...]

Filed Under: Church Leader, Friend Has Illness, Hurt Feelings, Invisible Illnesses, Marriage, Parents of Adult Children, Person w/ Illness, Person w/ lll Spouse, What's New? Tagged With: Bipolar Disorder, Desmond Tutu, fear, Health, Illness, Learning, Mary E. Siegel, Mental Health, Paul J. Donoghue, PhD, sick and tired of being sick and tired, Talk radio, We Really Need to Talk: Steps to Better Communication