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How a Husband Can Encourage a Chronically Ill Wife – The Spiritual and Emotional Stuff

May 31, 2011 By Leave a Comment
superrachel3

Matt Horne This is part 2 of a 2 part article. Part 1 is here: Carrying Super Rachel - The Logistics of When Your Wife Is Chronically Ill It's tough to live your life with a chronic illness. Even with the best attitude and support system, you have bad days where you think futile thoughts. "I should be able to do this. . . anybody my age should!" When you can't walk yourself across the room, it's easy to become depressed. Here are some of the ways I help my wife combat this mentality: I reinforce that she's definitely worth something--in face, everything--to me. We both are an active part of our support group, the Texas Association for Dysautonomia Awareness. I encourage her to participate in things she can find joy in and … [Read more...]

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Carrying Super Rachel – The Logistics of When Your Wife Is Chronically Ill

May 30, 2011 By 4 Comments
superrachel1

By Matt Horne Caring for a chronically ill wife is not what I had envisioned when I was working up the nerve to ask out "that hot girl" who would later become my wife. We were in college and she was on the cross country team. She let me know very early on in the relationship that she had a chronic illness. Nowadays, it's just part of life. I'm pretty sure I wouldn't know what to do with myself if she were well. There's a reason I call her "Super Rachel." On her good days, she can run circles around me--cleaning, getting things checked off her to-do list, and having tons of fun. She's amazing. On top of that, she has the greatest attitude and rarely lets her condition get her down. As her dad says, she's an "overcomer." Instead … [Read more...]

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Illness & Marriage – Please Don’t Kiss Me!

April 18, 2010 By 3 Comments
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"I'm not going to kiss you..." Who would ever think that hearing these words from your spouse would be considered a sign of his deep love? As my husband and I celebrated our 14th anniversary recently at a nice hotel on the Oregon Coast, we walked on the beach hand in hand, and finally, after 3 days I said, "Just kiss me!" so he did. He'd been in the state of "getting sick" for the last week on and off. The 1000-mile drive (and all the caffeine I kept handing him on the way to stay awake) had not exactly helped him fight it off. Yep, that kiss was really stepping out of a safety zone. I'm glad to say I didn't get sick. Some of you may laugh. If you don't have a chronic illness, you may think this all sounds a bit odd. I mean, who … [Read more...]

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Connect Again with Your Spouse – Book Sale $1.99

February 9, 2010 By Leave a Comment

With Valentine's Day just around the corner this cute little book has the potential to add some spark to your marriage regardless of where it is at. The book "Life Brighteners for Couples: 90 Notes to Touch Your Spouse's Heart" has 90 notes grounded in biblical encouragement - each one perfect for slipping into your mate's briefcase, purse, back pack or Bible. It's a great way to reconnect, especially when you have had a rough day or your typical conversation seems to always go back to something to do with your illness. In honor of Valentine's Day we are marking this book down from $7 to JUST $1.99 at the Rest Ministries Comfort Zone Bookstore through February 15th. Some other great books we recommend that are available at our … [Read more...]

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Love Endures When Your Spouse is Ill

February 9, 2010 By 2 Comments

In the process of loving someone with a chronic illness, we often feel a recurring pang of grief and fear that overshadows the happy moments of our lives. Because the shadow never lifts completely, we must depend on the healing power of love when medical science has no answers. I have come to understand that love endures when it is based more on friendship, respect and commitment than on romance. Such love carries with it a sense of belonging, a feeling of home. Couples who deeply love each other become so interwoven that it is difficult to tell where one stops and the other begins. They think alike, talk alike, even begin to look alike. As one devotes one's self to caregiving and weathers the storms of illness and recovery, you … [Read more...]

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How Do You Get Romantic with an Ill Wife?

January 26, 2010 By 2 Comments
HOW DO YOU GET ROMATIC WITH AN ILL WIFE? A Husband's Guide! When she is always in pain, worried about her body, wondering if she is still loveable, where do you start? It may actually be easier than you think to romance your wife despite her chronic pain.

So, you have an ill wife who is never in the mood, who says "ouch" when you give her a hug. But she wants to know you care. Now what? When your wife is chronically ill it can be hard for her to think "romance." She may be in a great deal of physical pain or also suffer from side effects of the illness or medications, such as weight gain or loss, a "puffy prednisone," or even feeling sick to her stomach. She may also be dealing with the loss of her career and dealing with grief. Be assured that you are not alone. Nearly 1 in 2 people in the USA live with a chronic illness and so many marriages are impacted. Unfortunately, nearly seventy-five percent of them end in divorce when an illness is that "third party" in the marriage. So, how … [Read more...]

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